Keeping a low profile. . . .
Hi everyone,Today was a pretty good day - no real urges to do anything related to gambling.. I find when I'm not gambling I'm keeping more of a low profile, both in work and my personal life. I guess things seem "calmer, which really does make sense since a lot of the anxiety I feel when gambling is due to the lying, sneaking around, feelling bad and stressed, etc. about the disaster I'm creating. Sometimes I don't feel completely comfortable with this feeling . . .not sure why. I guess it might be because I'm used to chaos and commotion and activity and eliminating those in my life feels like a big gap. Don't get me wrong - in most ways it is sooo much BETTER but I do believe that we can get addicted to the roller coaster and then when it's not there, we feel the difference. Thoughts, anyone? Meanwhile, I'm trying to enjoy the calm, peacefulness I feel tonight and look forward to another day GF - odaat,Hugs to all, Smokeygirl
Replies
I get what you are saying....when I quit gambling, I was actually afraid that there would be a big gap. Gambling creates that adrenalin rush...and I was worried my life would seem empty when I quit. Thankfully, it hasn\'t been that empty, but it is a transition, isn\'t it????
Love and Hugs, Dianne
Thank you both for your comments... I can see that it\'s growth and adjustment to the new way of being. Just a transition to the \"new\" me. There\'s a lot more I like about the new me than the old me. :] Thanks again - to another day GF for each of us! Smokeygirl
Interesting je! I think I know what you are saying about the chaos....sometimes I think I as an addict subconsiously create chaos becuase it feels familiar. I grew up in chaos and I think that recovery and serenity can feel \"strange\" for a while until it becomes a new \"normal\".
Love, Julie
I know what you mean about getting \"used to\" the new you. The madness of gambling and everything that goes with it was exhausting and took all my time and energy - when I stopped I was tired out - and then came recovery - totally different experience for me - working on the hardest thing in my life and seeing that if I daily put effort in - I would see results. I like this new mind of order in my life but it does take some getting used to. Hugs to you today Suzi
Well I can totally relate when I am not gambling I feel at peace because I am not in turmoil with myself and others...and like you said lying, cheating, stealing and it feels good.....I still find myself trying very hard to keep myself busy though because it had consunmed most of my time but I feel much better now that I am GF....Keep it up ODAAT.....Just for today GF