Keep the Change Reflections

In the book Keep the Change, Exercise 4 is about measuring your self esteem.
I feel best about myself when i give to others, especially my family.  That small toy my son wanted.  That blanket my wife wanted.  I feel good about myself when i make others happy.  I also feel good about myself when I am told i am doing good things.  That doesnt happen too often in my world it seems.  I think that is partially the reason i stayed with Global Shield, because Jay kept telling me that i was doing an awesome job, the clients all love me, and he is forever indebted.  it was boosting my morale.  Coming from another company that always had something to twist around, perverse, and gossip about me.  From a friend that was with the other company, it was because i was better then them, and they knew it.  I like to hear that i am doing well in life, but as mentioned, i am not used to it.  My wife used to tell me i was doing a good job all of the time.  I should have listened to the signs, and strove to hear if from her by my actions. 
How Do i prove (to myself or others) that i am okay?  I normally try to hide when i am upset.  I dont like to be upset.  I know that was very hard for me to do, because i was always so upset.  i normally tell myself its ok, and move on.  i do the same to others, i just say its ok, and move on and try to forget about it. 
How do i try to prove it to god?  before this mess, i didnt think too much about god.  I wont lie, i didnt.  Now after this mess, when i pray and ask for forgiveness, i generally feel better about it.  I Pray a lot more often, and before i do somehthing especially.  i seem to get a clearer focus when i pray.  Praying and asking god also helps me calm down a lot too.  Really, it does work.  i was soo upset last night over getting the divorce paperwork, that i just didnt know what to do.  I moped around about it, getting upset.  I fell down to my knees and began to pray.  I tried to sleep afterwards, but couldnt.  When i kept thinking about it, i read an article, and prayed about what i read.  I felt something inside me to follow what the article said, and write a letter to Sarah, letting her go.  It was hard for me to do.  After i wrote it, i prayed about it, and i posted it on this site to get feeback.  the few responses i had, were that it did sound genuine, which is my goal.  I wanted it to be from the heart.  I now know and understand that I cannot hold my wife against her will.  i do not want her to go, but i have to let her make her own decisions up.  I love her deeply and want her to know that god is helping me with the issues that i have, and i am changing for me and him.  I am also changing for my marriage, because that is what i commited to.