just notes from today

dealt with some difficulty this morning - felt like running -

but I did what I was supposed to do - just felt at odds with the job and myself

and then the sister who is supposed to be teaching

me is such a salty ole' barnacle (at least that's how I am trying to think of her)

and is such a pill with me - most of the time I have been so enraptured by the ceremony that I am ineffective

- but today I thought about how she was a nurse at one time and so she can be both objective

and subjective at the same time - I am trying to learn to do that as well..

then after services i just thought - tried grasping at straws to find my way back to myself and

came upon the wisdom that I think all this spinning I do is pretty much trying to understand and organize

my life - so that's where I am at - I am back up the hill now in the rectory - family zoom call soon.

Blue is my focus.

I am inspired by you guys to find new challenges!!

peace!