Just come out of a month long crisis and afraid I'm getting worse again!

Hi all! I've been out of action for a while now. I have just come out of a month long crisis which was sheer physical and emotional hell!! Full on respiratory failure and generalised paralysis and ended up with concomitant chest, sinus and stomach infections for which I am still on 3 different antibiotics.
I haven't eaten for 3 weeks and with tummy running 19 times a day on top of all the Weakness I have been left completely debilitated. The whole crisis resulted in me losing a job I had been so excited about and also coincided with the 1st anniversary of my dad and a friends passing and am sure that this worsened the disease too.
I ended up having severe drug interactions which caused  terrifyingly real hallucinations! I feel more traumatised than ever in my life before!! I forced my neuro to let me out of hospital for my sanity yesterday but am battling to breath so much again this afternoon that I am so afraid I'm slipping again!! My mom is with me for the weekend but then she has to fly back to Joburg and I'm all alone in Cape Town. I will never manage alone if things don't get much better over the weekend but the thought of going back into hospital makes my stomach go into a knot! I'm frustrated and terribly scared!!!