Just angry

I feel like eversince my husband died I have been banging my head aganist a cement wall. It feels I like I am just going in circles and not getting anywhere in life. To me same old stuff just a different day. I need my husband back cause when he was here there was some sort of sanity here and I felt stable. Now, I feel so unstable everyday.
I wake up and see how happy people are that are in love and I look at the babbies and I just feel like I do not belong anywhere anymore. I am not depressed just feel like I do not belong anywhere.