July 15, 2011
Dear Fred:
Today I did errands. Didn't get them all done but got the more important one taken care of. Financial things are beginning to shape up. Also the medical bills are about finished. I have found new medical insurance. (expensive and won't do much other than a major trip to the hospital) but at least I have it... just in case. I still need to work with the attorney & see if he can re-write the trust portion of my will concerning the cats. I also need to still work with the English accounts. After that I need to send thank you cards.
Tonight was Friday so it was dominoes night. As usual, I lost. Actually I don't mind losing. The ladies I play dominoes with have played for a long time. I'm just a newbey and am not very competitive. The game is fun and I enjoy the Friday night activity.
I am getting by by simply not allowing myself to think about how life has changed. I still cannot believe Nick is dead. He just can't be. He was so alive. I have to pretend that he has just left me.... a business trip, another woman. It doesn't matter, just so he has just left me. I can handle that. I cannot accept that he is dead. Just writing it causes great pain. Part of me keeps thinking that the cosmos will wake up & realize this has all been a huge mistake and bring him back. Well, enough of that.
I think I'll head for bed with a book, Thank you Fred for listening.
Darlene 7/15/2011
Today I did errands. Didn't get them all done but got the more important one taken care of. Financial things are beginning to shape up. Also the medical bills are about finished. I have found new medical insurance. (expensive and won't do much other than a major trip to the hospital) but at least I have it... just in case. I still need to work with the attorney & see if he can re-write the trust portion of my will concerning the cats. I also need to still work with the English accounts. After that I need to send thank you cards.
Tonight was Friday so it was dominoes night. As usual, I lost. Actually I don't mind losing. The ladies I play dominoes with have played for a long time. I'm just a newbey and am not very competitive. The game is fun and I enjoy the Friday night activity.
I am getting by by simply not allowing myself to think about how life has changed. I still cannot believe Nick is dead. He just can't be. He was so alive. I have to pretend that he has just left me.... a business trip, another woman. It doesn't matter, just so he has just left me. I can handle that. I cannot accept that he is dead. Just writing it causes great pain. Part of me keeps thinking that the cosmos will wake up & realize this has all been a huge mistake and bring him back. Well, enough of that.
I think I'll head for bed with a book, Thank you Fred for listening.
Darlene 7/15/2011
Replies