June

I dont know, I feel happy but at the same time there is an underlying factor of sadness. She helps me with it, she makes me truly happy, but there are times like right now that no matter I  feel so sad, and depressed. Its just a temporary thing, and I think it is because of all the caffeine I have in a day, and that me and a close friend have been smoking alot of weed lately and thats just not who I am. So Im quitting that, and Im going to get into really good shape. Im doing it for me, it is who I am, but I happen to let some people influence me because Im very laid back. I dont want to sound like I am complaining or anything else, but this just feels good to write it out. It almost feels like im doing a contract with myself, and otherwise I wouldn't  follow through with it with out writing this.