Initial post follow up

I had my initial post follow up visit on Wednesday.  I was s little upset because they told me I should have had an x-ray done before hand but was never given a script for one. Martha took off the steristrips today and said my incision looked good but now I'm bleeding from somewhere because when I woke up yesterday I had some blood on my daft collar. Martha also showed my how to adjust my collar another thing I was never instructed on how to do. She adjusted it and now it's on tighter than before. That may also be why I'm bleeding because I feel my neck is a lot more stretched out. I woke up at 4 am today with some discomfort in my lower back and am wondering if it has to do with the next cold front coming in. My shoulder muscles feel tighter and I don't know how to relax them. I'm stressing out about this collar situation. I want so bad to be me again but feel I'm slowly sinking into a huge hole with no where to go. I haven't been able to do anything with the boys which really upsets me because everything we have done has always been for them.