I wasn't what you deserved

--To Elaina; the closest thing in my heart
14 November
you were so beautiful, so lovely, so true
your brunette hair was the only thing you'd speak about
But it was your eyes that were the most catching
 
I wish i had a chance to say
all i ever meant; every single forgotten word
and to finally have the chance
to be the brother you deserve
But now; it's too late
 
what made you do it?
was it me? was it something else?
what didn't i know about you
that led to your final day?
 
this is the last time i want to see
you crying in my dreams
i finally know; why you were there-
you cried for my help; but i wasn't there.
 
i'm sorry i'm so horrible
i'm so sorry you're gone
i wish to hell i could save you
i wish to god that you're not gone
 
but i've already sold my soul
you were the one light i had left
my world grows ever dark
as i try to remember you.
 
Damn it; why wasn't i there?
 
14 Novemeber 2012 - Akumu Umaru
for what happened that night is not to ever be forgotten