I took the kids swimming last night but.....

Cerina and Raelynn didn't listen to me when I told them not to go to the deep end.  I told the lifeguard that neither of them had passed the deep end test and she still let them go down anyway when I requested they not to.  I can't punish them because one of the kids isn't mine But the other one is my step daughter and when I told my husband about the situation about Rae not listening to me, he's not going to punish her either.  I feel abused.  All I can say is it will be a long time before I take them all swimming again (for failure to listen to me)  My daughter went swimming too and there was this older girl in the pool, and the lifeguard wouldn't let my daughter in the deep end....can't say that I blame the lifeguard because my daughter hasn't passed the test.  Also the other girls ignored my daughter when I took them all to play with her and they spent most of the time in the deep end and not playing with my daughter....good thing is there was this other little girl there who played with my daughter for a bit so it wasn't as bad.  I am still upset about the ordeal.  How can I calm down?  Any suggestions?  PS--since my mood regulator is broke due to manic depression....I am agitated about all this and don't know how to settle down.....the only med I have is geodon and I don't have any anti anxiety meds....my pdoc won't give them to me after I repeatedly ask for them.