I still miss Smokey very much even though I am seeing Dave.

I still miss Smokey very much even though I am seeing Dave now.  This morning I sat and cried missing the love of my life Smokey.  It is not the same thing.  Smokey was a good, kind, decent, sharing, giving, loving and generous man.  Smokey was the love of my life and my soul mate, which you don't find very often or once in a blue moon. He had his weaknesses as we all do as well.  I figure if you get 80 percent good and 20 percent not, it is a great relationship that you got and you just do not throw the baby out with the bath water.  I had a horrible first marriage as did Smokey.  We knew a good thing when we saw it in each other's eyes.  Sigh!  He was gone too soon as far as I am concerned.  God gives and God takes.  God took away my Smokey.  God gave me Dave.  Interesting! 
Dave seems to be a good, nice, decent, kind, caring, giving, loyal and loving man as well.  We have been seeing one another for almost a month now.  We are very comfortable with each other.  We have said it just feels so right.  It is strange cause we don't know one another that well.   We are starting to get to know one another, which makes it interesting.  Dave enjoys football.  I hate sports.  Dave has his friends as I have mine.  Smokey never did.  Dave hangs around Richmond most of the time but ventures outside Richmond on occasion.  He was born in New Brunswick but the parents moved to Alberta, where Dave grew up.  Dave came to BC.  He has been with the same company for 22 years so I think it was related to his job as shipper/receiver.  Dave is good at what he does.  I can't complain.  We are taking this relationship one day at a time.  It is what I need at the moment.  Dave was in a common-in-law relationship with Catherine for ten years.  She broke it off and it hurt Dave a lot.  He had friends he stayed with for awhile.  Dave says he will always love Catherine.  I understand it.  I will always love Smokey till the day that I die.  When Dave came to BC, he wanted to meet people so he hung around the bars and met a few friends.  Now The Pumphouse is where he meets his friend a married couple named Gary and Kerry.  Dave is close with them.  They helped him thru the break up with Catherine and have been a major support for him.  He has a few other friends but they are not as close as Gary & Kerry.  Dave's friends are:  Kim (guy), Barry, and Darryl.  His nick name is Hi Tower as Dave stand 6 foot 5 inches tall.  I am a runt at five foot 2 inches tall in my socks. 
I am taking the Excel Course.  It is day 2 for me today.  I am nervous about it.  There is so much information.  I hope I can retain it and I do get the book.  I want to go over Day 1 lessons before I go to my course 9 - 1.  I got to chose my hours.  I need to buy the software so I can practice it on my home computer.  This is making me real nervous.  It has been 18 years since I last took a course in anything.
All the best from Diane Baillie

Replies

KipB
KipB

Best of luck with all your future ventures, Hugs, Kip.
OnMyOwn2010
OnMyOwn2010

I\'ve always believed that it\'s possible to love two at the same time...the human heart has an immense capacity for love & it\'s only increased when we allow Jesus to live there...I wish you all the best with this new friendship...I loved my husband with all of my heart...I will always love him...he\'ll always be in my heart, but I believe there is room in there for another...in God\'s timing...and I don\'t think my husband will mind sharing my love with another...and I\'m sure your Smokey would feel the same. I was blessed to read this... ~E~
deleted_user
deleted_user

Diane...I am sure it is hard to look at a relationship that is a month old and try and analyze it...I know we are never going to have the relationships we had with our spouses. If you read all the journals and new ones just joining they say pretty much the same thing...They have lost their soul mate, best friend and the love of their life. I do believe we can love more than once as I had a bad first marriage and then I was actually engaged to another man and called it off before we got married. But when Buddy came along I just knew...it was fate or some crazy thing. I do hope I can find someone to be a compainion, travel, enjoy conversation and share life together. But I know there will never be another Buddy or the loved that we shared. As far as your course goes...I know you will ace it...don\'t be scared...we can do anything if we put our minds to it!...hugs Ellen
pattiameo
pattiameo

Hang in there! You seem to have things in a good perspective now. Good luck with the Excel course, I am sure you will do well. Hugs, Patti