I seriously need to take hold

Today was a day where I took on some new responsibilities at work.

I did an ok job I think, but there might have been mistakes. If there were

mistakes, I hoping my boss will allow me to try again...which seems totally

a part of the learning curve for new work.

I came home and had lunch. Showered and dressed and then headed out

to get a coffee - and then drove over to this beautiful park named "The Gillette Ranch."

So pretty - I took pix while hiking and then came home.

I'm needing a little coaching right now - and I guess in order to do that for myself

I'm writing here - but also trying to take hold of the 'power' to pump myself up

mentally. I'm feeling like a pressure is pushing me down and I really have to shake it

off - I have to give myself the tools and space to work it out. It feels like I'm codependent

in an abstract way - wanting to depend on my therapist or my friends - and there's a big presure

but I know I have got to provide remedy by just trying and keep on my schedule a.k.a my routine or just

keep giving myself things to do.

I know that sounds maybe weird but 'the pressure exists' and I am releasing it

here in this journal.

Ok ...going to the mail box. :-)

Wish Mr. McFeely would deliver the post to me!

peace and hope you guys are having a peaceful day,

namaste,

Mark