I miss clothes shopping with CS.
The major thing that I miss about not having a gainfully paid job is shopping with my friends.
I loved going out for lunch and then shopping for clothes/shoes or whatever we needed.
I was watching a fashion shoe and started crying. I said to myself that's what I can't do at the moment. Ironically, when you want a new job or a new man in your life that the outside appearance is so important. You have be attractive to a new potential employer and/or potentially new man in your life. We have to look our best. Its so stupid that a man can put on 50 pounds but a woman has to be as skinny as she possibly can be. I never had a man that accepted me for my weight. Each man said that they would not accept me with weight gain. Even the love of my life did not like weight gain on a woman. I have high standards now because I want a man to accept me at my best or my worst. I think that is a rarity so I might not get what I want but I am not settling for anyone less. If I don't get what I want, then so be it to fill and fulfill my life with friends and family. They will always be important to me in my life. I appreciate Daily Strength even though Smokey died 3 years ago. He died on Nov. 15th which past last week. For the first time, the anniversary date came and went. I just realized that now as I look at the calendar. This is a very major thing for my healing from the grief. When the anniversary date came and went and I did not notice or feel it, a big wow for me. WOW!
I have got much going on in my life. On Friday Nov. 16th, Dave's room mate Rob Robson went to the hospital. He was going absolutely crazy and left a gross mess and was out of his head. Rob and my mutual friend Alla went over to visit Rob and found him in this state. She called 911 right away. He is hanging on my a thread with so much going on after over 30 years of abusive of excess alcohol and cigarettes. Its his heart, kidneys, pneumonia and infectious leg. He is not doing well. If they do anything, he could die. If the doctors don't do a thing, he could die. Its not a good situation. Alla keeps me informed about Rob. Rob's daughter came down from Kamloops. Its that serious. I got to know Rob in the two years I was with Dave up until I broke up with him. It shocked Dave. Dave is taking this week off to spend more time with Rob at the hospital. I hope it shocks Dave into sobriety. Its my hope. We shall see.
I just thought I would vent out all these feelings to you and don't need a reply, answers or solutions. We I need to vent...its just venting. No solutions. No answers. I just need to let it out.
From Diane B.
I loved going out for lunch and then shopping for clothes/shoes or whatever we needed.
I was watching a fashion shoe and started crying. I said to myself that's what I can't do at the moment. Ironically, when you want a new job or a new man in your life that the outside appearance is so important. You have be attractive to a new potential employer and/or potentially new man in your life. We have to look our best. Its so stupid that a man can put on 50 pounds but a woman has to be as skinny as she possibly can be. I never had a man that accepted me for my weight. Each man said that they would not accept me with weight gain. Even the love of my life did not like weight gain on a woman. I have high standards now because I want a man to accept me at my best or my worst. I think that is a rarity so I might not get what I want but I am not settling for anyone less. If I don't get what I want, then so be it to fill and fulfill my life with friends and family. They will always be important to me in my life. I appreciate Daily Strength even though Smokey died 3 years ago. He died on Nov. 15th which past last week. For the first time, the anniversary date came and went. I just realized that now as I look at the calendar. This is a very major thing for my healing from the grief. When the anniversary date came and went and I did not notice or feel it, a big wow for me. WOW!
I have got much going on in my life. On Friday Nov. 16th, Dave's room mate Rob Robson went to the hospital. He was going absolutely crazy and left a gross mess and was out of his head. Rob and my mutual friend Alla went over to visit Rob and found him in this state. She called 911 right away. He is hanging on my a thread with so much going on after over 30 years of abusive of excess alcohol and cigarettes. Its his heart, kidneys, pneumonia and infectious leg. He is not doing well. If they do anything, he could die. If the doctors don't do a thing, he could die. Its not a good situation. Alla keeps me informed about Rob. Rob's daughter came down from Kamloops. Its that serious. I got to know Rob in the two years I was with Dave up until I broke up with him. It shocked Dave. Dave is taking this week off to spend more time with Rob at the hospital. I hope it shocks Dave into sobriety. Its my hope. We shall see.
I just thought I would vent out all these feelings to you and don't need a reply, answers or solutions. We I need to vent...its just venting. No solutions. No answers. I just need to let it out.
From Diane B.
Replies
Hi Diane......wanted to share with you I have joined a 50+ singles group. I\'ll let you know how it goes after the first event. NOT to find a man, just to find new friends. Hugs, Wendy
Hi Diane......wanted to share with you I have joined a 50+ singles group. I\'ll let you know how it goes after the first event. NOT to find a man, just to find new friends. Hugs, Wendy
I feel your pain on the shopping thing. I realized that whenever I get together with friends it\'s about shopping or going to the movies or somewhere else. When means my social life will be severely limited once this job goes.
As to the weight thing, men are visual, women are not. We look for a deeper meaning in relationships. My husband was overweight and it never mattered to me. He didn\'t eat well, abusing his body with food. So, that\'s why I\'m changing. I\'ve felt so much pain losing my husband that I\'ve decided that if there is a new relationship, the man must be fit. I don\'t want someone who doesn\'t care anymore because I can\'t go through the pain I\'m feeling now as a widow. I expect the same from a man. I want a man who wants me whole and healthy. In most cases that mean\'s weight within normal range. I don\'t want to look like a Hollywood star. I want my hourglass figure--the size and style loved in the 1950s.
Take care. I\'m convinced there is a job out there for you and a man too. Also, I\'m with Patswife on the dating sites. I\'ve used online dating off and on for years. My first one was back nearly 30 years when they called it computer dating. It was great. Saved me a lot of time.