I'm not okay today

Dear Journal,

I am not okay.  I haven't been okay.  The last time I logged in was months ago.  Things were not so bad.  I think the worst of COVID-19 was starting out at that time.  Things have changed since then.  I don't know if it's my anxiety and depression causing physical symptoms.  I would like to think not.  It doesn't make sense and neither does just blaming a lack of exercise.  I know that I don't exercise as I probably should.  I'm 16 and I weigh about 180 lbs.  With ankle issues and other issues, it's hard to go for a long walk or a run without a bunch of pain.  But I don't think that, that alone should be the reason I have been experiencing these new odd symptoms.  My heart rate has been crazy.  I know when it's anxiety based because when I am anxious my heart will race and I will get tingly.  My watch catches it too.  But the other times, I don't understand it.  My heart rate jumps above 100 from 60-70 when I am getting up and starting to walk around a little.  Sometimes (not always) I will get dizzy and lightheaded.  When I do some more vigorous daily things like changing clothes or cleaning out the dishwasher my heartrate will climb further.  Today for instance, I took a shower and for most it isn't a tiring task.  But it is very tiring.  My heartrate was about 165, while after getting out I was trying to change my clothes.  That used to not happen.  I haven't really been a stickler for exercising for like 2 years.  This isn't everything.  My doctor doesn't think it's heart problems, she ran bloodwork that included my thyroid and A1C, and blood levels.  Everything had come back perfectly fine.  I should be happy at that, but I can't help but say that something is wrong and it feels like it's more than just being a little overweight, lack of exercise, and needing to get exercise.  But i'm 16 and at this point nobody is listening to me anymore.  My mom listened to me at first when I said something wasn't right, and she agreed with the doctor that it was probably just the weight gain and the lack of exercise.  But I don't eat bad either.  I will work on trying to get rid of the weight or something.  Or atleast trying to exercise.  If it doesn't help, what then!?

Anyways.  Until next time.

Sincerely,