I have too much time to think about Dave and me.
I have too much time to think about Dave and me.
1. Dave should have stood up to Rob about my weight. Rob was the one who has real issues about women's weight. Rob is a chronic alcoholic who can't afford to live on his own as he has so many outstanding debt issues. Rob has poor hygiene, dresses like a bum, makes up stories that are not true, instigages trouble, can't trust him, is vulgar/crude/rude and has no girlfriend. Who would want him the way he is? No one. Rob has kept a steady job so far but that could change.
2. Dave just wants a room mate to help in the cost of renting the two bedroom apartment. Rob does pay him cash.
3. Don't like how much Dave drinks beer either and he could turn into a Rob. Yikes!
4. Dave has a lot of positive qualities but some of them get out clipsed by the fact that he drinks too much beer.
5. I am thinking about my relationship with Dave over and over again in my head. I know if I left Dave, he would be heart broken. He hardly suruvived when Catherine left him in 2005. He still talks about it to this day.
6. Rob told Alla (our mutual woman friend) that Diane needs Dave more than Dave needs Diane. It is not true. I was alone before I met Dave and will be again after Dave. I think Dave needs me more than I need him.
7. Dave has extremely low self esteem. What am I his mother? Not!
8. The booze does afffect his libido that is for sure. Too much booze and too low libido. His head wants what the body cannot do because of the booze. It's all I will say on the subject. I want someone who can keep up with me. I don't know if I will ever meet anyone like that in my life. So far, I have not. All I can say is before Smokey, I did not know that I enjoyed sex at all. He was the best I ever had in my life and the love of my life. I miss him so very much. No one is like my Smokey. I hope one day I will find someone who is half decent and similar to Smokey.
9. I can't see my relationship Dave lasting for a long time. I think it will be a short term affair. I can always be wrong but things would have to chang a lot.
These are my thoughts what I have been thinking about my relationship with Dave. Nothing is concrete nor written in stone. Dave has a wonderful, huge and warm heart, which is why I am with him. He is a gentle giant, giving, sharing, helpful, wanting to help wherever he can, doesn't want to hurt anyone, loving heart for people, nice, kind and wants a woman beside him. I have a huge list of his positive points. Dave is a good man.
Let me ask you does all his good points out weigh the few bad points.
Can I live with the bad things about Dave? I guess it is a personal thing of what you can live with and what you can't live with. Can I live with all these things about Dave is my question? I am going to keep thinking about it, meditating about it and praying about all these things. I will reach my own conclusions. I am in God's hands and even God is guiding the outcome of my relationship with Dave. Is there someone else better than Dave for me? Is Dave the best? I don't have any of the answers just the questions.
I will keep everyone posted on Daily Strenght and wish all of you the best from my heart to yours from Diane Baillie
1. Dave should have stood up to Rob about my weight. Rob was the one who has real issues about women's weight. Rob is a chronic alcoholic who can't afford to live on his own as he has so many outstanding debt issues. Rob has poor hygiene, dresses like a bum, makes up stories that are not true, instigages trouble, can't trust him, is vulgar/crude/rude and has no girlfriend. Who would want him the way he is? No one. Rob has kept a steady job so far but that could change.
2. Dave just wants a room mate to help in the cost of renting the two bedroom apartment. Rob does pay him cash.
3. Don't like how much Dave drinks beer either and he could turn into a Rob. Yikes!
4. Dave has a lot of positive qualities but some of them get out clipsed by the fact that he drinks too much beer.
5. I am thinking about my relationship with Dave over and over again in my head. I know if I left Dave, he would be heart broken. He hardly suruvived when Catherine left him in 2005. He still talks about it to this day.
6. Rob told Alla (our mutual woman friend) that Diane needs Dave more than Dave needs Diane. It is not true. I was alone before I met Dave and will be again after Dave. I think Dave needs me more than I need him.
7. Dave has extremely low self esteem. What am I his mother? Not!
8. The booze does afffect his libido that is for sure. Too much booze and too low libido. His head wants what the body cannot do because of the booze. It's all I will say on the subject. I want someone who can keep up with me. I don't know if I will ever meet anyone like that in my life. So far, I have not. All I can say is before Smokey, I did not know that I enjoyed sex at all. He was the best I ever had in my life and the love of my life. I miss him so very much. No one is like my Smokey. I hope one day I will find someone who is half decent and similar to Smokey.
9. I can't see my relationship Dave lasting for a long time. I think it will be a short term affair. I can always be wrong but things would have to chang a lot.
These are my thoughts what I have been thinking about my relationship with Dave. Nothing is concrete nor written in stone. Dave has a wonderful, huge and warm heart, which is why I am with him. He is a gentle giant, giving, sharing, helpful, wanting to help wherever he can, doesn't want to hurt anyone, loving heart for people, nice, kind and wants a woman beside him. I have a huge list of his positive points. Dave is a good man.
Let me ask you does all his good points out weigh the few bad points.
Can I live with the bad things about Dave? I guess it is a personal thing of what you can live with and what you can't live with. Can I live with all these things about Dave is my question? I am going to keep thinking about it, meditating about it and praying about all these things. I will reach my own conclusions. I am in God's hands and even God is guiding the outcome of my relationship with Dave. Is there someone else better than Dave for me? Is Dave the best? I don't have any of the answers just the questions.
I will keep everyone posted on Daily Strenght and wish all of you the best from my heart to yours from Diane Baillie
Replies
I think Rob is threatened by your relationship with Dave. Having said that, I do think you need to pay attention to the red flags. You don\'t have to \"settle\" because you are lonely. I am lonely too, but I do not want to put up with even an ounce of negativity. As long as Dave is associated with Rob, you will have problems. Good luck with whatever you decide to do.
I agree with the last post. ALSO..........does he ever take you anywhere, you deserve better. Hugs, Wendy
Diane. I sent you a message a little earlier, before reading this journal. Some more things have been revealed here. I can honestly say that I do not know if Dave is the one. I am glad you are pondering on it, it just proves that you are not sure either, if he was, you would not have doubted it for a minute. He might have a good heart, etc, but I do not think he is the BEST. Just remember, you do not have to settle for 2nd best. You deserve it all and from the above you are not going to get it, with or without Rob on the picture. Dave should stand up for you, especially seeing it is still such a new relationship. Can you imagine in a year or 2 if this is already taking place. I wish you well with whatever decision you make, but please think it through carefully and mail me when ever you want. Here for you.
Hugs
Karen
I think from all that you have posted that you have already reached a conclusion. You are a strong woman and you deserve a good man......like your Smokey.....that will respect and love you as you are.
Hugs, Dianne
I have to agree with Dianne/MrsJRS. Hugs Denise
Only you can decide if Dave\'s good qualities are enough, but Rob definitely seems to be a liability to your relationship with Dave. Dave seems to be a good man, but may be letting Rob negatively influence him. How close is their friendship? What would Dave think about finding another roommate? Just some thoughts. Hugs to you, Patti