I feel guilty.

I feel guilty about spending so much money in the past on things I really didn't need but enjoyed buying. I didn't need to get a new coach purse twice a year. I didn't need to spend $38 on estee Lauder foundation. I have about 10 bottles of bath and body shower gel in the closet. I still have sweaters in my closet with tags on them. Why did I do this? I blame some of it on being hypomanic at times but some of it was just me being selfish.
 The $15 clinique face soap,the $50 aveda face mask, the expensive philosophy hand lotion, the paul Mitchell hair spray,the aveda shampoo and conditioner,all the clinique make-up I own. I have about 25 different shades of nail Polish. What the hell was I thinking???  There are people starving in the world and i had to have the same sweater in 8 different colors??? 
I justified it all in my head because I worked so hard for my salary. I didn't need the $65 a month massage membership either. And getting my hair highlighted every 6 weeks not to mention my eyebrows waxed every 3 weeks and the pedicures once a month.
I know I'm not suppose to beat myself up about the past but it's all depressing. I spent so much money and time focussing on my outsides that I was neglecting my insides and burning myself out at work. I knew my health was suffering but I just get plugging away. So many regrets.
So now it's dove soap for my face,no make up,aveeno shampoo and conditioner,suave hand lotion and hairspray,plucking my own eyebrows,my niece highlights and cuts my hair for free, I paint my own toenails and no more massages.
I need to keep finding more ways to save money. I'm not sure if I can make my own laundry detergent like Ashley does but it might be worth a try. I know my t doc says to splurge every once in awhile but I feel so guilty afterwards that I'm not sure it's worth it.