I feel beyond worthless, and helpless, and pathetic

so I posted a journal about what happened last Sunday at work, well this sunday I will go in after church again, probably get more verbal abuse and then after that I will go in at 2.  Still losing hours but at least it isn't 4 hours.
But in general this week has completely sucked.  After work, I wanted to surprise my husband and take him out to dinner, but as soon as I get in, a friend calls needing help, and yes I know it sounds petty but it seems like every time I want to surprise him, something ruins it.  Monday was okay, and then Tuesday I did something wrong at my main job, because I didn't know, since I'm still new I don't know a lot of the stuff, but it still makes me feel crappy.
And then yesterday I made yet another mistake and with the way my life has gone lately I just wonder how long before they fire me...I love this job but I'm obviously not good enough for it.
 
I just can't seem to fix my life...and financially I am so far screwed which is why I am still working two jobs though I am always exhausted.  It's a long story but i let a so-called friend take advantage of me for 6 months...and it royally screwed me, you can PM for details if you want....
I feel so lost anymore.  I was finally getting to where I could deal with my depression, and no longer had suicidal thoughts...and now I am going farther into that hole...and I'm scared...