I dont know what to do, cant cope.

I literally dont know what to do. After standing up for myself I am left alone with both parents against me and yet I am still 100% relying on them as my carers. I am so angry and so scared, I feel sick. Its just a lifetime of constant control and manipulation and when I dare fight back, they still have all the power over me. I cant get out and I dont know what to do.

My mother will never admit to any of the things she does, she genuinely believes she has a right to control my life and that my consent is not required for any decision she makes involving me or my things. Im sick to death of it. Im sick to death of my disease, my life isnt a life, each day i am just trying to survive and for what. Either I let her completely control me or I stand up for myself and am utterly alone and helpless and cannot ask for help, which i very obviously need. I wont be allowed to leave the house now for a week but I cant stand the thought of being anywhere with them anyway. I cannot get any of the things I needed to do today because she is punishing me for standing up for myself. I will be alone in my room all day, without being able to do anything, as i always have to have help bringing things to my bed etc. And I dont care right now. I just dont want to be anywhere near them. but its not fair. I cant escape. I cant run away . I cant disown my family. i cant look after myself. I cant even get a one night away from them.