I don't have the power to fight anymore
It scares me that I realized I am no longer afraid of dying. I feel like my life isn't worth anything. I have no purpose, no goals, no life, so why be alive physically? The thought of dying isn't a scary thought anymore. Actually it seems as a comforting escape at this point. An escape from life, from pain, from everything.
It seems that I cannot control my problems anymore. I feel as though whatever power I had in me -to fight the depression, the voices in my head, the pain- is gone. I don't want to fight anymore. I don't want to care, I don't want to try. I just want to give up. Do nothing. I want to sit at home, in my PJs, under my blankets, and do nothing. I want to eat junk, I don't want to care, I want to drink or get high or do anything that will get my mind off of everything going on in my life. I want to give up.
I don't have the power to fight anymore.
It seems that I cannot control my problems anymore. I feel as though whatever power I had in me -to fight the depression, the voices in my head, the pain- is gone. I don't want to fight anymore. I don't want to care, I don't want to try. I just want to give up. Do nothing. I want to sit at home, in my PJs, under my blankets, and do nothing. I want to eat junk, I don't want to care, I want to drink or get high or do anything that will get my mind off of everything going on in my life. I want to give up.
I don't have the power to fight anymore.
Replies
I\'ve been away for awhile so I am sorry that I didn\'t offer support during your time of need. How are you feeling now? Have you gotten support from your family? Hang in there...
I\'m doing better. I have my ups and downs... Guess we all do. Some days I feel like I can conquer the world and other days I want to crawl in a hole somewhere and never come out. I try as much as I can to keep myself distracted with anything.. University work, gym, whatever keeps me busy and around people.
I still can\'t get myself to talk to my family. I still think it\'ll hurt them and that\'s one thing I\'m sure I don\'t want to do.