i can't believe i'm feeling this way

i'm not sure what's going on with me.  life is good.  a little stressful.  i'm playing catch up with my finances but all needs and some wants are being handled.  we are good.  i know i'm blessed.  in the forefront of my mind i feel rejected by someone i never had a chnace with.  i guess i thought maybe i did and so i flirted with him.  it was fun.  i was just playful and it was cool. 
we work together and he pulls me aside to tell me that i should refrain from flirting with him.  he's clear that its not b/c he felt some kinda way, but he shares that he went through a buncha stuff when he had a relationship with another co worker. 
it ended badly but he shares that he's totally hung up on this chick even though he expressses that she totally did him wrong and may be distrurbed.  he says she absolutely is but if she was willing he'd absolutly get back together with her.
i miss flirting with him it broke up my day and we seem to have a lot in common.  i thought there was some kinda connection.  and i would guess there was for him to share so.
but i feel rejected b/c  he doesnt want me.  so simple.  but not.  i think im projecting.  it's not so much him.  it's just so frustrating that men i know; that ive been involved with or interacted with would rather have anyone but me.  i know its not that simple. 
i just hate feeling this way.
logically i get that people want what they want and it is no reflection on me, but it kinda hurts.
that someone would rather be in a toxic relationship with someone who is no good for him than try it with a nice kind person u have lots in commone with.
it;s just frustrating that i keep meeting these unavilable unemotional guys?
or maybe just not that into me guys.  sporatic affection/attention. and men that appear to have some potential would rather someone else; anybody else.
that's the emotional not logical.
there are great people male and femal in my life who love me and that's so great and wonderful.
but the thing that happens in a romantic relationship; well one with commitment is they say u r the best.  i would rather spend my time with u over anyone else most of the time. i choose u.  i love u in a way i don't love anyone else.
i miss that.  i don't know that i have ever had that.
i wonder if i will ever have that.