I am figuring why I find Smokey's death so hard
I am beginning to realize why Ii am finding Smokey's death so very hard. It was that I was not really accepting it and probably was trying to deny it in my heart. Alas, reality bites. The reality it hitting me hard and now I have to accept Smokey's death. I keep looking around the apartment and it all reminds me of Smokey. I look at the dining room chair where he sat and I cry. I look at the door where he came at 3:30 p.m. and I cry. I look at the pillow beside me where I sleep and I cry. The whole apartment reminds me of all the love we shared together as a team. it was great, beautiful and deep. We loved each other so very much. It all hurts but I have to accept it and heal. I want to heal and move on with my life. I want to fall in love again. I figure 3rd time must be the charm. I was divorced once and so was Smokey then we found one another and just fell into each other's arms. It was great.