I am dead inside or so I thought
I thought that I was dead inside. That the pain and sadness that I feel could no longer hurt me, but I was wrong. Can anyone tell me how to stop the pain? It is ruining my life. I no longer find joy in doing any of the things that I used to. I just want to stay in bed and not go out anywhere. I want to cry, in fact I cry so much lately that I want to rip my eyes out. I don't even like to get out of bed to take care of myself. I just don't want to anything. Like if I stay in bed then I could just disappear. That people coulnd't play me and hurt me so much. I mean I used to think I was a friendly person, but now I am not so sure. There is one person, a woman named Marcella, who is after (and may have already stolen) my beloved boyfriend. I just want to beat the holy crap out of this woman and then I want to mak eher feel some of the pain that she has been putting me through. I fucking want to rip her hair out by the roots and feed her fatty foods til she blows up like a damm ballon. I know I can't do this but I want her to know and feel what I am feeling. I fucking hate her.
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