how will this story end

It is now time to see what I have learned. It is time to see if I have figured out how to apply the concepts I have worked hard learning. I have met someone who is truly amazing. He thinks im beautiful despite some of my flaws he never misses an opportunity to compliment me. He tells me thinking of me makes him smile. He knows what it is like to have your heart broken because he has also been cheated on before. He has the same morals and values that I have. He makes me believe that their are still good men out there in this world. He loves his family , he cares fore everyone around him. He is the person I dreamed of always being with.

Right on cue here comes my ex. ready to charge in and mess everything up. Telling me all the things I dreamed of for years. The problem is that they are all lies. He wants to ruin the first good thing for me. He enjoys watching me in pain and somehow gets a kick out of seeing me hurt. I am convinced that deep down something is very wrong with him. Despite knowing all I know this codependent side of me that was always incapable of letting him go is wanting to see if any of what he says is true.

I have a choice. I can go down the good path or I can continue the self destructive path and ruin any chance of happiness. the choice is easy right? the problem is my mind and heart haven't caught up yet. Lets see if I have learned enough in therapy, lets see if I will choose myself and not allow anyone to ever use me like he did again. we will see how much I have changed or we will see what it is I am actually made of by the choices I will make in the coming weeks.

I hope that I can look back at this in a few months and be so proud of where I am. I hope I read this someday and feel that this was the first step to a new future . I want to prove to myself that I am better then the person I was. I want to show myself that I have learned something these 9 months.