..how quickly things can turn around
...we were blessed with a 2015 Kia Optima and it took all day to get approved but i told my wife this morning that she was gonna get her blessing and she did..four weeks ago in the heart of my addiction she couldnt have afforded to even try and take on this automobile as wild as i was acting in the streets so it just makes you wonder about God's timimg. Ia m by no ways out of the woods but im not standing on the corner tongiht @ 330 trying to panhandle that last 20 dollars wondering why that last hit just didnt hit the spot..why i had to share half with someone who has a pipe and i dont..and did i have the courage just turn towards home and let it go for the night...no im not on that kind of time tonight..im in the bed typing ...grateful..to be writing this and thankful that i have a trusted new friend in this fellowship and grateful...im keeping that 330 in the front of my mind at all times cause that shit is painful...and i just dont want to go back there..and so i continue moving forward..
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Your 3:30 spot is called a trigger. You need to stay around from there if at all possiblel. I had triggers eveywhere I went I stopped and cooked at rest areas on my way to work, at work and stayed up all night cooking. Then I started having blackouts and got scared and was coughing up black stuff. (i think it was my lungs). I can look back now and see all the bad things in my life that it caused me and it wasn\'t worth it. I\'m talking a 2000.00 a day habit. I was addicted to my dealers. It was coming right off the plane and not cut. If you quit you will go back to where you were when you quit. I didn\'t believe that and when I bought an 8ball it didn\'t last and I was back to 2 ounces a day within a few days. It\'s an evil drug and I can say I am so happy to be free from it. I hope you continue to keep fighting it. You sound strong don\'t let the demon win. hang in there and I\'m here for you.
Big Hugs