Hoping Today I'll be able to get some things done...
Today I'm hoping will turn out to be a fairly busy day, at least busy compared to most of my days. I've already talked to my niece many days ago about her giving me a ride to the grocery store today, since I'm " out " of groceries completely. Put it this way, I had to spend money for pizza delivery yesterday, and that was money I really didn't have to spare. I still have some left over pizza today, but not that much. I really don't want to think of that as the only thing I'll have to eat all day today. I know she has her own things going on in her life, but at the same time she knows that I can't help asking her for a ride at least once a month.
My only other possible option to going to the grocery store is this one friend that lives fairly close to me. She's a nice person, but it's nearly always practically impossible to catch her when she isn't too busy. Besides that she drives one of those suvs / pickup style sort of, and that would involve a lot of climbing in and out of her vehicle that I don't think my bad knees could possibly handle today. She makes it hard enough every time she gives me a ride anywhere when she doesn't park very close to the sidewalk. So I not only have to walk all the way out of my apartment with my walker, to the parking lot, but then I have to walk an additional distance to where she parked ! She's got to know that every time she does that it kills me ! Maybe she has some distorted idea that she's doing me a " favor " in a sense, by making me walk a longer distance ! She's not ! All it does it make the pain in both of my knees even more intense... instead of a level 10 pain in both knees, that changes to a 15 + level pain ! She's got to see it on my face when I'm struggling to walk all the way to her vehicle, but still she's never said one word about it.
She likes to call herself my " good friend ", but I can't help wondering sometimes if in reality she's really just a friend in name only. If I sound a bit harsh, or bitter at all, I think it's because of the pain I'm experiencing in my knees right now. I do my best to not let the constant pain affect my moods, but sometimes I can't help it.
Just to let anyone know that reads this post, I have tried everything possible for the pain in my knees. Nothing helps ! Nothing ! I've had several doctors tell me that the only " other " prescription option for the pain would be trying drugs that are extremely addictive, and they don't want to risk that with me. That's nice of them to decide that for me. But in my opinion I think it'd be worth the risk. After all, I don't have a history of addiction. They should have considered that fact. I could see telling a drug addict that they won't put them on a much stronger prescription, but why me ? It doesn't make any sense, except for possibly they're only thinking of themselves. Those doctors are probably simply afraid of possible malpractice lawsuits if they prescribe an extremely powerful drug to someone, and they get addicted to it, that they might sue the doctor for prescribing it. That's probably it. Yet knowing that doesn't change the fact that I'm left with nothing to take for the pain.
Of course I've tried every possible over-the-counter pain remedy, and that's proved completely useless. I might as well be chewing on a piece of gum, or swallowing a piece of candy, for all of the " non-affect " that those remedies have on me.
I try to stay as busy as possible throughout my day to hopefully keep my mind off of the pain. It works to a certain degree some days, but it depends on the level of pain I'm dealing with that day. It's hard to stay busy when you're living alone, and you don't go out to work at all. It's funny how when I was working I wished I didn't have to, and now I wish to God that I was working ! We're never quite happy with how things are at that moment it seems. We're always wanting something different.
Well, I think I've rambled on enough for my first post on here. I'll be writing again soon. Writing is my passion. I do my best to make it a habit to do some writing every day. I've loved to write since I was in high school. I've got to give my high school English teacher credit. She encouraged my love of writing. I've carried her encouragement with me ever since then. The affect that certain teachers have on our lives is wonderful.
My only other possible option to going to the grocery store is this one friend that lives fairly close to me. She's a nice person, but it's nearly always practically impossible to catch her when she isn't too busy. Besides that she drives one of those suvs / pickup style sort of, and that would involve a lot of climbing in and out of her vehicle that I don't think my bad knees could possibly handle today. She makes it hard enough every time she gives me a ride anywhere when she doesn't park very close to the sidewalk. So I not only have to walk all the way out of my apartment with my walker, to the parking lot, but then I have to walk an additional distance to where she parked ! She's got to know that every time she does that it kills me ! Maybe she has some distorted idea that she's doing me a " favor " in a sense, by making me walk a longer distance ! She's not ! All it does it make the pain in both of my knees even more intense... instead of a level 10 pain in both knees, that changes to a 15 + level pain ! She's got to see it on my face when I'm struggling to walk all the way to her vehicle, but still she's never said one word about it.
She likes to call herself my " good friend ", but I can't help wondering sometimes if in reality she's really just a friend in name only. If I sound a bit harsh, or bitter at all, I think it's because of the pain I'm experiencing in my knees right now. I do my best to not let the constant pain affect my moods, but sometimes I can't help it.
Just to let anyone know that reads this post, I have tried everything possible for the pain in my knees. Nothing helps ! Nothing ! I've had several doctors tell me that the only " other " prescription option for the pain would be trying drugs that are extremely addictive, and they don't want to risk that with me. That's nice of them to decide that for me. But in my opinion I think it'd be worth the risk. After all, I don't have a history of addiction. They should have considered that fact. I could see telling a drug addict that they won't put them on a much stronger prescription, but why me ? It doesn't make any sense, except for possibly they're only thinking of themselves. Those doctors are probably simply afraid of possible malpractice lawsuits if they prescribe an extremely powerful drug to someone, and they get addicted to it, that they might sue the doctor for prescribing it. That's probably it. Yet knowing that doesn't change the fact that I'm left with nothing to take for the pain.
Of course I've tried every possible over-the-counter pain remedy, and that's proved completely useless. I might as well be chewing on a piece of gum, or swallowing a piece of candy, for all of the " non-affect " that those remedies have on me.
I try to stay as busy as possible throughout my day to hopefully keep my mind off of the pain. It works to a certain degree some days, but it depends on the level of pain I'm dealing with that day. It's hard to stay busy when you're living alone, and you don't go out to work at all. It's funny how when I was working I wished I didn't have to, and now I wish to God that I was working ! We're never quite happy with how things are at that moment it seems. We're always wanting something different.
Well, I think I've rambled on enough for my first post on here. I'll be writing again soon. Writing is my passion. I do my best to make it a habit to do some writing every day. I've loved to write since I was in high school. I've got to give my high school English teacher credit. She encouraged my love of writing. I've carried her encouragement with me ever since then. The affect that certain teachers have on our lives is wonderful.
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