Home from IP
15 days of COMPLETE HELL later and I am HOME!
Just got discharged from IP at Sheppard Pratt this afternoon...starting the day program at the Renfrew Center in Bethesda, Maryland tomorrow. Will do that for a month or more and then step down to IOP there and then back to my OP team.
I'm so pissed right now and nerouvs and angry and ahhh.
I just found out that Renfrew doesn't want me to see my Outpatient T while i'm there. I NEED to see her. It's been OVER two weeks. I MUST see her. My T in treatment SUCKED MAJOR BALLS. I'm so sad righ tnow. I don't know what to do :( I'm going to ask them tomorrow if I can see her JUST ONCE this week before treatment REALLY gets underway.
My heart is racing a million times a minute....ya probably because of my fucked up heart but also because I'm so scared and terrifed and nervous. I hve just wanted to cry since coming home...oh and I BARELY got discharged today. but ya....
Well I kept a HUGE journal on paper while in treatment. Tomorrow after the day program I'm going to start typing it all up...well the important parts and i'll post that....
But I am alive. Happier and Healthier. But scared to all shit. I don't know if I can continue this at home :( I"m so nervous- but I guess that's why I am going to a day program.
Mis syou all and I am so sorry that I have not been in touch very much :(
Hope everyone is doing okay...don't think I'm going to be on here much to comment and such- but i'll still be writing my journals. In a month or so when I'm more stable I'll probably come back full time to commenting. I feel selfish but I know I need to focus on myself.
Love and Support to all,
Steff
Just got discharged from IP at Sheppard Pratt this afternoon...starting the day program at the Renfrew Center in Bethesda, Maryland tomorrow. Will do that for a month or more and then step down to IOP there and then back to my OP team.
I'm so pissed right now and nerouvs and angry and ahhh.
I just found out that Renfrew doesn't want me to see my Outpatient T while i'm there. I NEED to see her. It's been OVER two weeks. I MUST see her. My T in treatment SUCKED MAJOR BALLS. I'm so sad righ tnow. I don't know what to do :( I'm going to ask them tomorrow if I can see her JUST ONCE this week before treatment REALLY gets underway.
My heart is racing a million times a minute....ya probably because of my fucked up heart but also because I'm so scared and terrifed and nervous. I hve just wanted to cry since coming home...oh and I BARELY got discharged today. but ya....
Well I kept a HUGE journal on paper while in treatment. Tomorrow after the day program I'm going to start typing it all up...well the important parts and i'll post that....
But I am alive. Happier and Healthier. But scared to all shit. I don't know if I can continue this at home :( I"m so nervous- but I guess that's why I am going to a day program.
Mis syou all and I am so sorry that I have not been in touch very much :(
Hope everyone is doing okay...don't think I'm going to be on here much to comment and such- but i'll still be writing my journals. In a month or so when I'm more stable I'll probably come back full time to commenting. I feel selfish but I know I need to focus on myself.
Love and Support to all,
Steff
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