Home Alone
Winter Storm in North Carolina this Saturday morning and I am home alone. Except for Savanna (dog). John works for a contractor for Progress Energy and had to be in Jacksonville with morning at 7:00 with his clothes packed. They are expecting power outage has the sleet will turn into freezing ran later today. The ground is covered in ice. I can't even see the road for the ice. I have cooked a big pot of homemade soup this morning. In case the power does go out I will have my soup. When John leaves on this outages he does not know how long he will be gone. He might be back tonight or a couple of days. Since Josh's accident I do not like being home by myself. It is took quite. To much time to think. To much time to remember and the pain sits in. I will try to stay busy but there is only so much cleaning and washing clothes I can do. I do have 115 Compassionate Friends newsletter to get out. That will keep me busy for a while. If only Josh was here to keep me company. I can hear him in his room with the TV gooding, incense burning, and him laughing on the phone with Logan. Then the famous words "Mama what are we going to eat." He liked soup but he loved the juice and the okra more. That is all he wanted out of the pot. I sat at my desk yesterday looking at his pictures. I have one when he was about 9 or 10 making a snow angel. Memories. Thank God for my memories. What would it be like if I didn't have them? Even though they do sting at times. But I would not trade not one single one of them. I am so looking forward to spring. I know my poor fish in Josh's Memorial Pond is too. Their water is ice this morning. I am ready to see the flowers bloom. I am ready for the retreat!!!!! I wish each of you a good weekend. Mama loves you Josh.
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