Holidays and anxiety

Well I guess I going to my sisters for Christmas, I have not seen much of my family since AUG after a falling out. ( previous post) I am feeling very anxious and not to terrible exicted. But I have a son that wants and needs family around him. I also feel it's important to learn to let things go, if you can't change it. My Mom of course will be there, I really hope she doesn't expect me to run up and give her hugs and kisses. it ain't going to happen. If this is whats she expects , it will make things uncomfortable, not just for me but for everyone whos there. I will handle this gently and with great care as I really don't want to deal with her or anyone else who thinks they can tell what or how I should feel.  As you can tell this is where my anxiety is coming from.. I will get there on time not late but certainly not early. and trust me I'll will be leaving as early as possible.. I do have a niece and nephew that are both calling me to make sure that I will be there, they don't want to go if I'm not there, they went to Thanksgiving and said they wished they hadn't gone for too many reason to mention. also my olderst brother is going to drive down from No Calif, but who knows, it depends on if the weather permits... I'm sure that when all is said and done things, it will be ok. But I will jurnal about it afterwards... I'm wishing each and everyone of  you a warm and heartfelt Holiday greeting, May you enjoy all they may bring..Campyone