Here we go again....
a few months ago, a woman I was friendly with, we used to get together every couple of months, she "ghosted" me. I made several attempts to contact her, and she never returned calls or texts, for some reason, which I have no clue what the reason would be. The last time I saw her, we had a great time and she said she valued my friendship. I know she's still around, because I see her current posts on Facebook. Why she ghosted me I have no clue, and she's not returning calls or texts.
Tonight of all nights, depressing Friday night, another woman I was? friends with just canceled on me. She was telling me she had a ton of paper shredding and she didn't know where to do it. I told her my co-op development brings a truck and does it, but I had to make an appointment. Now I am highly embarrased, I make an appointment for the shredding and she cancelled for no apparent reason, she just said she was going out to eat with her husband. This is the 3rd time she cancelled something with me. Lately I got the feeling she wasn't really listening to what I was saying when we talked on the phone.
I feel totally stupid because the management office where I made the appointment is closed for the weekend, so I can't cancel. Now tomorrow, the truck will come and she cancelled. I just pray to god that I'm not the only one that called them.
I am so fed up with people who I thought were "friends". I am so fed up with people in general. No one is nice anymore. Maybe I'm too nice? If someone has a problem, I try to help, it comes just naturally. So here I am alone again, weekend is here, have nothing to do and nowhere to go. Everyone is too busy for me and doesn't seem to give a crap.
Replies
Ah Maria, sorry you had this happen to you. I know how this hurts. Some people in life are a huge let down.
Some people (most people it feels like) have NO manners. This reflects badly on HER. You offered help, arranged an appointment and she goes out to eat? Does she realise or care about the position that's put you in. Think twice before putting yourself out there for her again as she's shown her self to be unreliable.
As for the other friend that ghosted you, perhaps a subtle text (or Facebook message) suggesting you miss her lately, ask her is everything ok in a general way, not relating to the friendship only. Keep it light and see what she replies. Other than that I'm not sure what else you could or should do. Whatever her reason for keeping distant from you, dont let it make you doubt yourself. I hope she proves to be a worthy friend.
Stay bright Maria. You're worth a lot more than these people have given.
Virtual hug coming your way.
That's a shame that these people are treating you this way but don't change, you have to be who and what you are no matter what.
I have no idea why they are treating you this way but it sure isn't you. You are a kind person and want to help, there is nothing wrong with that.
Like Solus said, maybe just send a quick text or message and actually ask if something is wrong.
Great big hugs and hope you get out for some fun this weekend even if you go by yourself, it wouldn't be the first time. We can't always count on others!!
I totally feel ya, which is why I don't really have any female friends. They are total flakes. When I was younger I had a small group of friends, men and women, and we all would hang out together and collaborate to work on stuff if anybody had problems. They were good people.
But now most people I know, like at work, are just wishy washy and like to complain. I've learned to keep my mouth shut when people at work talk about their problems because I've realized that they make fun of me behind my back for doing so. Most of the time they don't want help, they are just bored and like to complain to stir up drama. I guess just ignore women, maybe make some guy friends? I have some really good gay male friends and they are great.
I mean they make fun of me for trying to help or make suggestions.