having misgivings
I am having misgivings about a bunch of things, I don't have the answers right now.
I did have a nip of some "Calvados" a few hours ago...it could be coloring my outlook though
it was quite a while ago. I feel like I have upset my therapist. I feel like I have upset my Pop.
I feel unsure how to move forward with all the thoughts I have about my life. I feel like
I have tried to understand my nature and yet I don't 'make a go' of it. Perhaps I will look
at how I have handled the work at the office. I was given an idea initially and I created a whole
Excel document out of nothing, really...over a thousand entries in it now. And I still have a hard time
giving myself credit that I have achieved anything...or that I have actually done it... But I think
if I take inspiration from this idea - that I started something and I created something - and with determination and regularity
I have stayed with the project - and along the way of staying with it - I have discovered new things - new ways of thinking about the initial idea - and also have gained some fluency and comfort with the process and field of what I am looking into. I think I can apply that success with the project, I can apply that to NOW.
I have also found myself being able to take the project from vague concept - to an orderly system. That I am kind of proud of too. But I think this gives me ground to stand on.
I see my Dad tonight. I see my therapist on Friday - hopefully things will go well. I know they will.
Peace and Namaste!
Mark
Replies
Isn't "misgivings" another word for "question," my fellow questioner? Your questioning compulsion is merely looking for loopholes. Of course you have misgivings/doubts/questions/misunderstandings, etcetera, etceteri. Questioning is what questioners do. The more simple I keep that natural fact, the better chance I have of developing better uses for the natural talent. Driving myself crazier with the talent is not the most effective use available.
That's my theory and I'm sticking to it. Pass the Calvados. Keep your sissy glass. Calvados has enough alcohol to sterilize surgical equipment. You might catch my cold by swigging from the same bottle, but the Calvados will get that pesky bug on the way down.
Thanks Arfie!!! Glug, glug....
Even straight out of the bottle, Calvados ain't no bathtub gin. . .
Sip, sip. . . Savor, savor. . . Clear them sinuses right out, it will.
Just the fact that you can work with Excel is amazing. When I was in school taking a class on computers, I just couldn't get the excel. My sister is a whiz with it, of course she is an accountant and very smart. Hope all goes well with your dad and your tdoc.
thanks you guys!
having a nip nip eh?
sometimes a little nip nip is needed.
It really does my mood badly though. It sets me ruminating a lot,...feeding the bad wolf. Not so good.