Having faith...
What started out as a very bad day, I guess wasn't so bad after all... You see I was looking for my life insurance paperwork, dreading that I knew I had to change my beneficiary and remove your name Greg, that made it so real for me, I knew you weren't coming back. I finally found the paperwork in the safe and while there decided I would see what else was in there. I found your baby book, the outfit I brought you home from the hospital in, lots of art work from when you were little, all of your boy scout stuff and much much more. I actually smiled today, first time in a long time.
I even started a scrape book for you Gregor, but for some reason I still have a hard time looking at your pictures from when you were older, why is that?
I STILL MISS YOU SO MUCH...
O Lord, my feet have been swept out from under me, but in Your loving arms I am steady and secure. Amen.
I even started a scrape book for you Gregor, but for some reason I still have a hard time looking at your pictures from when you were older, why is that?
I STILL MISS YOU SO MUCH...
O Lord, my feet have been swept out from under me, but in Your loving arms I am steady and secure. Amen.
Replies
(((hugs)))
I\'m so glad the day turned out not so bad after all. I\'m so glad you were able to find pleasure, and smiles, while holding and looking at, and perhaps even smelling, the treasures which had been safely tucked away.
I guess the older photos bring you closer to the \"last\" photo\'s, and that\'s SOO hard for our hearts....knowing this was the last picture taken of our precious children.... I know my friend....I know. I have only shared Kala\'s last picture once.....I rarely look at it....it\'s hard knowing what happened just hours later.... But the younger ones can transport me back in time....to a happy place, happy memories....so, I linger there....
Love to you sweet friend!
Love to your Gregor!
Cherishing those \"Gregor\" things ....so nice....for me it was looking at the baby pictures that was so hard.....glad your day turned out ok....love ya!
I understand having trouble looking at his picture. Pictures draw you in...and when you are in...you \"go there\" and it is hard. There are no rules for when you look...and how often...do what feels comfortable for you...love and gentle hugs...Karen
Grateful that what began as a very challenging task indeed became lighter with the happening of seeing those treasures of Gregor.
I too find it very hard to look at those \"last\" pictures and simply cannot believe that any of us even have to write such a thing. It hurts...
Loving care to you as you wander in your memories and know that Gregor\'s life is so much more than that one \"final\" picture or fateful day. This takes time to begin to embrace and to accept, yet slowly it does come to each of us. The moms told me of this early on in this journey for me and all I could do was hope that what they were saying one day I might begin to feel as well. This becomes part of our life\'s work...
Gentle care to you today and in the ones ahead.
XO Joanie
Its nice to hear that something that was hard to do turned out to be something that made you smile. I just love it when we think of our children & the special memories touch our heart once again & we feel some joy. :)