Have been Crashed and Slammed Down.
Hi Dear DS Family,
Well I have been so weak, that it lead to depression. Thank God for Easter Sunday for the Resurrection celebration has always been dear to me. I love Jesus and all His teachings, even though I am no longer a practicing Catholic. I am more Spiritual presently and not involved in any organized religion. I didn't go to Mass Easter Sunday which is one of the rare times I go. I was alone and trying to pack. Thinking about what the day represents pulled me out of a deep depression and I feel resurrected myself. I think these pills (anti-hormones) for the breast cancer are affecting me quite negatively. So I tell my oncologist and she sends me to a psychiatrist, but I didn't go because I know he will just prescribe an antidepressant... Another pill to cover up what a pill is doing to me biologically Its just not for me.
I firmly believe to embrace all my feelings and by God's Grace move with and then through them. I don't remember feeling that depressed and it lingers. I know this too shall pass. Living with CFS is sometimes overwhelming. Then we all have other issues in life and then it's Yikes! I pray on my bed and can meditate only a short while but Breathe slowly and mindfully to become centered in God Awareness. Trying to pack has been rough but I am on it more now. I intend to rent this room where I am going for under a year then off to Arizona. My son isn't present unless he needs me and I can't give him what he wants. I am unable to clean and be with grandsons consistently take nag care of their needs etc. my son is angry that I can't contribute more. That is something he has to deal with. I love him and grandsons dearly, however I have been learning to love myself through this journey and need to care for myself because nobody else is going to care for me except our Lord.
I was hanging on by my teeth and now my whole body is involved rising for whatever life brings and meeting it with courage, which always incorporates strength. I am ever so Grateful for Faith, Hope, and Love. I am Grateful to be able to come here and journal for its healing. I am ever so Grateful for my DS FAMILY that care and understands how I may feel and gives me loving encouragement
Well I have been so weak, that it lead to depression. Thank God for Easter Sunday for the Resurrection celebration has always been dear to me. I love Jesus and all His teachings, even though I am no longer a practicing Catholic. I am more Spiritual presently and not involved in any organized religion. I didn't go to Mass Easter Sunday which is one of the rare times I go. I was alone and trying to pack. Thinking about what the day represents pulled me out of a deep depression and I feel resurrected myself. I think these pills (anti-hormones) for the breast cancer are affecting me quite negatively. So I tell my oncologist and she sends me to a psychiatrist, but I didn't go because I know he will just prescribe an antidepressant... Another pill to cover up what a pill is doing to me biologically Its just not for me.
I firmly believe to embrace all my feelings and by God's Grace move with and then through them. I don't remember feeling that depressed and it lingers. I know this too shall pass. Living with CFS is sometimes overwhelming. Then we all have other issues in life and then it's Yikes! I pray on my bed and can meditate only a short while but Breathe slowly and mindfully to become centered in God Awareness. Trying to pack has been rough but I am on it more now. I intend to rent this room where I am going for under a year then off to Arizona. My son isn't present unless he needs me and I can't give him what he wants. I am unable to clean and be with grandsons consistently take nag care of their needs etc. my son is angry that I can't contribute more. That is something he has to deal with. I love him and grandsons dearly, however I have been learning to love myself through this journey and need to care for myself because nobody else is going to care for me except our Lord.
I was hanging on by my teeth and now my whole body is involved rising for whatever life brings and meeting it with courage, which always incorporates strength. I am ever so Grateful for Faith, Hope, and Love. I am Grateful to be able to come here and journal for its healing. I am ever so Grateful for my DS FAMILY that care and understands how I may feel and gives me loving encouragement
Replies
Hi, sweetheart. My mom had breast cancer and the anti-hormone pill really did her in. It changed so much for her. She wasn\'t herself. I know you don\'t want another pill, but just prayerfully consider the fact that the anti-hormone pill may be causing low serotonin levels. I mean, if you had diabetes, you would take your insulin. It\'s really no different to take an antidepressant for a chemical imbalance than to take medicine for some other physical condition. But, it\'s not my intention to try to sway you. I\'m just throwing it out there. I am so glad you have prayer and the presence of Jesus. I can understand not loving religion, but I\'m glad you still love Jesus. He is not to blame for the craziness of people. Much love.
I have VERY mixed feelings about anti-depressants, in part because I have researched the research on them and frankly - during trials, placebo\'s did very very slightly worse than the \"anti;s\", meaning - they have about the same effect. If you can sit outside, in the sun, for 20 minutes each day - you will get a similar effect. Vitamin D is also very helpful. However, I am NOT a doctor! Are there any Holistic doc\'s where you are? Depression, never mind breast cancer and CFS is just a lot to deal with my friend.
I agree with your suggestion and Thank you for sharing about your mother\'s experience. I am currently taking Cymbalta for pain, for it sure doesn\'t help in the depression area, however it does with pain very well. I also take a low dose amitriptyline to help with sleep and this is why I am a bit fed up with taking more pills.
Oh yes yes I love Christ with all my heart ever since I was a young girl of seven. I am grateful I went to Catholic Grammer School where I learned all about Sweet Jesus. He truly is my Lord and Savior in so many aspects of life
I was watching all the movies of His teachings, Passion, and Resurrection on Holy Saturday . Good Friday is always a difficult day but knowing that Easter Sunday is coming I get through it. I have a very special relationship with Him.
I will check on med issue for the depression that these pills are causing, I am in the middle of moving and very disorganized in my head. Lol. Brain Fog is having its way with me. Just a full plate that with the Grace of God I will manage to get through. I will call psychiatrist and make another appointment. I hope he is a good chemist and I can get on track ..
Hugs and Gratitude for your consideration
Am glad to hear you are getting packed for your move. i hope that brings you some peace and hopefulness. YOua re doing the right thing. Ou are not able nor obligated to take care of your son\'s problems. I have to say I agree with Triunfadora about not giving up on the idea of an antidepressant. YOu may need some help while you are on these other meds that are draining the good brain chemicals out of your body. YOu might consider giving it a try. And i am an experienced taker of anti0-depressants and know very well how they can help or cause worsening, but it seems like they maight be calling out to you at this point. You are the only one who can ake the decision and know what you feel intuitively is right for you. Glad to hear that you have faith to carry you through these really rough times.
May you be blessed,
Denise
You are a strong, brave woman, Debra. You are dealing with so much right now. I wish your son had a better understanding of what you are going through. Sometimes our children can be so selfish. They just don\'t get \"CFS\" and you have other challenges as well. He should be helping YOU!!! Ya know?? I know you love your g/kids. I love mine too, but they are in another state and I rarely see them. That\'s a great gift....grandchildren. Truly...they are so innocent and have no idea what kind of evil is in this world. That\'s why we need the Lord and His grace and mercy to get through each day.
Praying that your packing and renting and dealing with these illnesses will just not sap the last bit of strength you have, dear Debra.
Praying for and supporting you! xox