Hate the monster!

So tonight has not been a good night at all. Coming home from town and the closer we got the worse I felt. All because I knew my brother in law would be drunk by the time we got back and it was really dark out. Have been in bed since 8:26 pm. Is this ever going to end? Cause I am really not liking it one bit. The anxiety can go to hell and leave me alone. I am holding I can get through it and when we move into our new place, our place. Things will start to get better.