Happy Thanksgiving!
The hypomania was worse today. I was up at 3am, off and on until about 5:30am when I just couldn't sleep anymore. I said screw it and got out of bed at 7 to start the turkey. The food came out good, and everyone liked the turkey. Geo's family didn't eat the green bean casserole which kinda insulted me a bit, but maybe they don't like green beans. I just know when I go over there I eat a bit of everything that's cooked whether I like it or not. But they are adults and they can do their own thing. More green beans for me! Geo was the only one who got into the stuffing, since I had some before when I was making it. Geo's stepmother made some sweet potato casserole, and it came out pretty good considering I don't like sweet potatoes. Her mashed potatoes came out wonderful as always. I'm glad that everyone had a good time.
I fell asleep in the middle of the day... I had to take some klonopin to get to take a nap, but I needed it. I was exhausted, and I needed some help getting to sleep. Hopefully I sleep better tonight. I know I need it. I just hope I don't crash from this hypomania as badly as I did last time. I took a bit of extra Depakote to moderate my mood... I'm not going to take any more after today, it was just a preventative measure against going higher. I know it's a safe dose for me because I've been on it and had my blood levels tested and they came out okay. I think I'm going to sleep well tonight... I'm tired. I just need to last until Monday when I can go back to work.
So, today is Thanksgiving. I'm thankful for my family, how they are there for me through everything I have put them through. I know I can count on my sister for advice on my mental issues, on my brother for financial support, and for my stepdad for both. My mom is there for me as much as she can, and gives me the love that only a mother can. I miss my dad, but I know he would be proud of me. I'm also thankful for my friends, those who have stuck by me through the years and put up with my crap. I put people though a lot of crap, so I don't normally keep friends for long. I have a friend, Kenia, who I need to see soon. I haven't seen her in a while and she's such a good friend that I need to tell her. I also have my friend Jimmy, who lives in LA and is like a brother to me, and Vanessa who was there for me last year when I was having a hard time. I have Heather, who always puts a smile on my face, and Andrea who listens to me prattle on every night for hours.
I also have my online friends, here on DS. I know Ann is there for me, reading my journals and commenting with her wise ways. Blue Toes is always going to be there with calm advice, and Zee is going to stick with me on my weight battle through thick and thin. I have my weight loss buddy, looking 2b happy, and she's great too. She's helped me get through what has been a hard month and still lost weight. Good 2 Go is always good about being supportive, even when I don't meet my goals. If I've missed anyone, it's late and I'm tired. I still love you all, and care about every one of you. That includes you, Donnie, who reads my journal but doesn't comment. You still get your own shout-out.
I'm thankful for Geo, who has been by my side for 6 and a half years now. I don't know what I would do without him, and I'm thankful for his support every day. There's no words to describe how much I love him, and what I would do just to be with him. When my days get bad and there's nothing left to keep me going, I know I can count on him to be there for me with a kind word and a hug. Sometimes, that's all a girl needs to feel better.
I'm grateful for small things, like food in the fridge, a good night's sleep (which I really need lol), a roof over my head and financial stability. I'm glad I have my health, even if my mental health isn't that great, it could be worse. I'm grateful I have the ability to help others, and that I can walk, breathe, use my arms, and see. I'm glad I don't have to struggle as hard as others do to survive. I've struggled myself with many things in my life, and I'm glad just to be in a spot where things aren't that bad and even looking up. I'm glad I can eat, and even if I don't meet my calories every day (or go over, like I did today), that the ED that held me for years has almost gone. There is hope out there, and I just want everyone to know that I'm thankful for everything you have done over the years. *hugs* to all!
I fell asleep in the middle of the day... I had to take some klonopin to get to take a nap, but I needed it. I was exhausted, and I needed some help getting to sleep. Hopefully I sleep better tonight. I know I need it. I just hope I don't crash from this hypomania as badly as I did last time. I took a bit of extra Depakote to moderate my mood... I'm not going to take any more after today, it was just a preventative measure against going higher. I know it's a safe dose for me because I've been on it and had my blood levels tested and they came out okay. I think I'm going to sleep well tonight... I'm tired. I just need to last until Monday when I can go back to work.
So, today is Thanksgiving. I'm thankful for my family, how they are there for me through everything I have put them through. I know I can count on my sister for advice on my mental issues, on my brother for financial support, and for my stepdad for both. My mom is there for me as much as she can, and gives me the love that only a mother can. I miss my dad, but I know he would be proud of me. I'm also thankful for my friends, those who have stuck by me through the years and put up with my crap. I put people though a lot of crap, so I don't normally keep friends for long. I have a friend, Kenia, who I need to see soon. I haven't seen her in a while and she's such a good friend that I need to tell her. I also have my friend Jimmy, who lives in LA and is like a brother to me, and Vanessa who was there for me last year when I was having a hard time. I have Heather, who always puts a smile on my face, and Andrea who listens to me prattle on every night for hours.
I also have my online friends, here on DS. I know Ann is there for me, reading my journals and commenting with her wise ways. Blue Toes is always going to be there with calm advice, and Zee is going to stick with me on my weight battle through thick and thin. I have my weight loss buddy, looking 2b happy, and she's great too. She's helped me get through what has been a hard month and still lost weight. Good 2 Go is always good about being supportive, even when I don't meet my goals. If I've missed anyone, it's late and I'm tired. I still love you all, and care about every one of you. That includes you, Donnie, who reads my journal but doesn't comment. You still get your own shout-out.
I'm thankful for Geo, who has been by my side for 6 and a half years now. I don't know what I would do without him, and I'm thankful for his support every day. There's no words to describe how much I love him, and what I would do just to be with him. When my days get bad and there's nothing left to keep me going, I know I can count on him to be there for me with a kind word and a hug. Sometimes, that's all a girl needs to feel better.
I'm grateful for small things, like food in the fridge, a good night's sleep (which I really need lol), a roof over my head and financial stability. I'm glad I have my health, even if my mental health isn't that great, it could be worse. I'm grateful I have the ability to help others, and that I can walk, breathe, use my arms, and see. I'm glad I don't have to struggle as hard as others do to survive. I've struggled myself with many things in my life, and I'm glad just to be in a spot where things aren't that bad and even looking up. I'm glad I can eat, and even if I don't meet my calories every day (or go over, like I did today), that the ED that held me for years has almost gone. There is hope out there, and I just want everyone to know that I'm thankful for everything you have done over the years. *hugs* to all!
Replies
bravo!!!! your journal is exactly what thanksgiving is all about. we all need to think and remind ourselves of what we really do have to be thankful and blessed for. i am thankful for you larissa, hugsss