Grief can rob us of our minds, logic thinking etc.

It is funny how grief can rob us of our minds, any logical thinking, proper thoughts, and intensifies our feelings 100% or more.  There are times when I think I am going crazy by all these things.  We can go thru other difficulties of life and the grief intensifies how we react to them.  When my Smokey first died, I hated going to get the mail and that feeling was magnified.  I got angry at picking up the mail.  Even now, I still dread getting the mail.  At first when I thought of looking for a job and getting my resumes out, I hated it so much and stopped for awhile.  I am back into doing it again and don't feel as bad.  Grief robs us of so much including our loved ones.  Grief can make us do stupid things without thinking.  Grief is a hard thing to go thru in life when we lose someone we love.  I hate going grocery shopping without Smokey but I am slowly getting used to doing it alone.  I am slowly really slowly getting used to living alone without Smokey.  Smokey loved me deeply, protected me and looked after me.  Smokey is a very hard man to replace.  I am realizing after all this time just how much Smokey really, truly, deeply and madly loved me.  There are many reasons why I miss him so very much.