gotta settle down

After all this stuff I wrote , I started shivering like mad, took my temp........I'm running a fever........that explains a lot.......love ya'll.  Gonna put on some socks, make some tea, hunker down under a blanket and listen to some singers do some fine singin'..........xoxooxox
phew........settle down girl........settle down.  feel like a startled pony, let me outta the stall.........let me run for awhile, run off this day.........these feelings, it will pass.........it will i promise.
i got all wore out doing........slept all night and slept all day.........well not all day, woke at 4 pm this afternoon, had some wild & interesting dreams........feel like i lost my place, but the deal is when you gotta sleep, ya just gotta sleep.  ain't no arguing with the body when it's that depleted.
when the pain ramps up, it isn't as sudden as it seems to be.........it's more that i'm just slower processing what's going on.  so i got up and showered, filled my medicine thingy up for two weeks..........that felt like a test in and of itself.  but did it........pulled on some clothes....yanked the covers up........not a made bed, just smoothed things out.....ya'll do that trick too?  Saves me steps........xoxo.
Came in the kitchen and the kitties were in a raucous mood.......meowing on instant replay and prowling.  I usually feed them their wet food between five and six........but since I've been a bed monkey all day, they must think it's their only shot at getting food.  I could almost see their picket signs and yes i feel their pain........better treatment, more cat benefits......like early cat feedings........seriously a sign with a cat picketing that says "early bird specials or else!"  is just wrong, after all they live with a sparrow........dooficy pun sorry.
ok gonna stop with that nonsense and move on.......i got the clothes in the washer, took the trash out, flipped the calendar to MAY........AHHHHHH!  Emptied the dishwasher, filled the water bottles.......and hollered at Annie twice.........Annie was so anxious I guess that she was patrolling my feet closer and closer and I almost fell, grabbed the counter......hollered and then it happened again about 30 seconds later. 
Settle down.........Ruth you are not that alert, aware, awake.  You are hurting and PUSHING to do stuff...........why all the pressure to do this stuff right now, get 'er done, move it lady..........but i did.  i don't usually......... feel the fibro pain hitting 70 mph......knowing more pain (speeds up to 100 mph) is rattling my serenity. 
awareness brings honesty.  with honesty comes a moment of clarity......it says, sit down, catch your breath........c'mon, sit.  just breathe........take it slow.  anxiety ups the heart in such an uncomfortable way.............claim your peace of mind little bird........name it, claim it and cherish it.
You're worth it, we're all worth it.........we are top rated, 5 star, first place, next to be served, amazing wonderful priceless individuals............and we need to remember that......share it with others, pass it on.......we all do the best we can on any given day........and every day that is given to us is a gift.
re: yesterdays journal about the unreasonable man working at Target is in progress.  I spoke to corporate and filed a complaint.  It is turned over to the management team and his store manager will be notified.  I still have the image of this man standing by the front door arms crossed like a prison warden flanked on both sides by two big target boys - so weird...........read the last few paragraphs of yesterdays journal if you're curious...... things were poorly handled, hoping for a good resolution.  that young man should not be in a position of leadership.......ah well it was a mess, gotta keep moving on.........and upward. 
love to all, hugs and more hugs!