Got a new job
I am a defense contractor and the contract that I worked under ran out on 6 Jan. So I am have been unemployed since then. Just got my written offer of employment last night. Yeah. But my depression is sorting of winning out today with all the reasons that I should lose the job before it starts on the 5th of April. It is very hard for me to accept good things. I am firmly rooted in depression and sadness that I am finding ways to talk my way out of this job. The ECT usually helps for a couple of weeks but this job is too big of a thing for this depression to pass up.
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Take a moment and write out the positives for the job! That is awesome that you have breathing room in between the contracts, There is not but a couple of weeks til the 5th of April. I'm thrilled for you to have this in your schedule!
The depression can be neutralized in the moment through the moments of success even with sadness for the change. The change will be good for you.
Please know you have our support, encouragement, and best wishes to make it through this challenge!
Congrats on the new job, Thor, but don't beat yourself up for not dancing a jig about it. You've got a lot going on so it's good you asked for support in tackling it come April. It's a challenge to handle a job and ptsd for all of us so we get it and we're with you!
Congratulations on the job, Thor! I tend to do a sort of self-sabotaging thing when something positive happens and it’s rooted to my experiences from the past in several ways. I feel like I’ve spent many a therapy session just simply trying to deal with working. The complexities of work and the environment and the nature of it. The years of therapy have helped and I can cope with the work on most days. I still have to vent and tend to get stuck in workaholic mode but again, it’s how I’ve been conditioned from past experiences. I hope it helps to know there are resources and peers who are around to listen.
This renewed contract is a good thing. Congratulations and you deserve it.