Getting discouraged again
I was up until the early morning hours then slept in until about 10:30. Why do I do that??? It is going to make it even harder to get up for work tomorrow and I am already feeling like I am dragging myself in every day.
My body is hurting again. It had felt better Friday after I left work. I was convinced I had a serious illness Friday but I think all it was is being seriously sick of work. I have begun to hate my job because of the bullshit going on. I'm too out of shape to get a job where I have to be on my feet all day.
I have to find some way of dealing with the stress. My body just hurts all week long. Walking hurts, my back hurts, I feel like I have a fever, my throat feels sore. I get headaches, feel like I can't breath. I finally noticed the pattern. I only feel this bad during the work week. Now it is Sunday and another week of hell begins. At least I have Thursday and Friday off.
The prepacking is going slowly, too slowly. I don't have motivation but I know if I don't keep moving it will never get done.
I feel like crying. I am so discouraged. I just want to sit here in my chair and do nothing. At the same time I want to finish up the packing and sorting of at least the kitchen.
Time to take more ibuprofen. It does help some.
My body is hurting again. It had felt better Friday after I left work. I was convinced I had a serious illness Friday but I think all it was is being seriously sick of work. I have begun to hate my job because of the bullshit going on. I'm too out of shape to get a job where I have to be on my feet all day.
I have to find some way of dealing with the stress. My body just hurts all week long. Walking hurts, my back hurts, I feel like I have a fever, my throat feels sore. I get headaches, feel like I can't breath. I finally noticed the pattern. I only feel this bad during the work week. Now it is Sunday and another week of hell begins. At least I have Thursday and Friday off.
The prepacking is going slowly, too slowly. I don't have motivation but I know if I don't keep moving it will never get done.
I feel like crying. I am so discouraged. I just want to sit here in my chair and do nothing. At the same time I want to finish up the packing and sorting of at least the kitchen.
Time to take more ibuprofen. It does help some.
Replies
Aww sorry your sleeping is out of whack. No wonder you are sleeping more if your body hurts so much. It sounds like it might be stress related with your work if you feel better on the weekends. I used to get Sunday night depression as I had to face another work week. I hope that doesn\'t happen to you. I understand the need to cry, if you let yourself have a good cry will it help to let the pain out? Crying helps me and I feel the endorphins it releases afterwards. Hugs.
Sleeping until 10:30 on a Sunday? Sounds perfectly reasonable to me. You have had so much stress lately, your body surely needs the extra rest.
You are too hard on yourself. Has anyone ever said this to you before?
You know what? Lilly makes an excellent point - a lot of us don\'t even work, can\'t even hold jobs - and you do it all. That\'s a BIG DEAL. Think about it.
I am so afraid of losing my job. I am so afraid of the fear taking over again and I won\'t be able to leave the apartment. I\'m trying to not let the fear get to me though.
I\'m sorry you\'re going through this. I hate to say it, but this seems like the kind of thing medication is good for ... Is it helping?
I am just on Lamictal. The last one I tried was Celexa and it messed up my sleep so badly that I was never getting into deep sleep. My option was to add another med to make me sleep or stop the celexa. I\'m not a fan of taking one med to counteract another. Don\'t get me wrong I think medication can be immensely helpful. I have been on some that were. Sadly they made me crap myself. SSRI\'s all give me explosive diarrhea. Seriously. I gave each one at least a month hoping it would be transient. It never stopped and just got worse. I won\'t live like that.