Getting Another " Break " from the Chaos, for awhile at least...

Today when I woke up I discovered that he was getting ready to go " OUT ". 

Most of the time that behaviour would give rise to a whirlwind of speculations about where he was really going to, as opposed to where he told me he's going out to, but this time I was simply thankful the reprieve from his chaotic / constant mood swing behaviour ! 

So right now it's about 1:10 PM, and he's still out.

He called a couple of times to give me " updates " on what he was checking out during this excursion. This action I thought was kind of sweet of him, since for the most part he normally wouldn't have bothered to call. 

What I'm sure he didn't stop to realize was that even if he hadn't called me at all, I would not have bothered to call him. I would have been far too busy enjoying my peace and quiet, to interupt it by calling him.

It doesn't really matter at this point. I'm simply thankful to GOD that I've been able to enjoy some real peace and quiet today - so far. I'm hoping that this theme of " peace " continues throughout the rest of the day, and into the evening hours as well. 

What he always fails to realize is that many times when he thinks I'm NOT wanting to get a shower, actually once I'm in there - and in the middle of the showering process, I end up enjoying my time to myself in there. It's " peaceful " in it's own way.... simply having some time to myself in the bathroom - without him hanging over my shoulder nagging me about anything. 

When I say " nagging ", I don't mean it always in the usual traditional sense. What I'm talking about is when he hovers over me in a severely judgemental / and critical way during every little thing I do for US - ( or even when I'm simply doing something for myself ) ! Every little thing I do he seems to LOVE to JUDGE, CRITIZE, PICK ON, GRADE, CRITQUE, AND ULTIMATELY PUT ME DOWN ABOUT IF I DARE TO DO SOMETHING EVEN SLIGHTLY " DIFFERENT " THAN HE WOULD DO IT !!!!!

I'm so sick and tired of him being so damn critical with me ... every single step I take ! LITERALLY ! 

OF COURSE.... whenever I dare to do the same thing with him, then I'm the worst bitch ever ! .... I end up getting called every possible name in the book, possibly have things thrown at me, possibly get spit at, threatened to get beat up - or actually hit in some fashion, and put down with every possible insult he can come up with !!!!! 

I get ALL of that..... IF I dare to do the SAME BEHAVIOUR that he does with ME ! 

FAIR ????!!!!  ... OH HELL NO !!!!

BUT .. Does he give a damn that it's NOT FAIR ?!?!... OH HELL NO !!!