From here on.

Saturday July 9th - in hospital still but have to go back home as they don't have my seizure meds and not had any for 2 days and we're scared I'll have a seizure. We were only gone for around half hour and the nurses knew they didn't have my medication and I had to have it. When we got back to the ward the junior doctors 'disciplined' Me by removing the only working cannula that was left. They insisted on me drinking 4 litres a day which is impossible as the swelling from water retention in my feet is made even worse. They also insisted on having to have hourly painful injections as they had removed the needle from my arm. We were furious at this blatant attempt of bullying, threats and 'God' like attitude. What on earth happens now?

Wednesday 13th. GP is back today. She confirmed the heart effusion has been caused as I'm in heart failure. CT scan confirms the effusion and bloods indicate the failure. Got to have an echo cardiogram to discover which part of the heart is in failure. The second CT confirmed I have ulcerative colitis too which is causing crippling pain spasms and violent vomiting to match the pain. 

Thursday 15th. Rushed into hospital again when I collapsed in agony during a flare up but couldn't cope with a 4th attempt of operating on the inner tops of my arms with no local anaesthetic. The doctor who very uncomfortably pinned me down by my arms had disappeared too. Dan said he very clearly disliked the 17th century operating practice and couldn't make eye contact with us when he eventually reappeared. Dan brought me home as they've mangled the top of both arms and got nowhere.

Friday 16th. GP rang very upset at the treatment we are experiencing at treliske hospital and remembered dr Skinner had recommended I have permanent vascular access fitted so she's trying to arrange this as matter of urgency now as the only thing holding back any treatment was the idiot doctor who removed the sole working cannula left and now the problem is that they cannot find any further veins to cannulate.

3.45am Saturday 16th.

My catheter has blocked so it's sending my bladder into spasms just to add to the pain. Like I really need it any worse. Can't sleep like this so stuck on sofa til I can ring the nurses at 8. Have my little Bengal boy keeping me company. He won't leave my side at the moment and even Dan has noticed him following me around. He thinks that he's trying to look after me in his own little way bless him. Just read Iwon'tbackdown1's journal on pain and have never really known anybody before that can relate so well to what I'm going through too. Especially pain. It's hard trying to describe the agony when it's bad but it finally looks like there's someone else that can truly understand. Bless her xxxxx