First time in a VERY long time..... But....

Today - Sunday June 30 th - was the first time in a very long time that Him and I had done anything " intimate ". It was a very unexpected surprise to me for him to suddenly come up to me - asking me to come to the bedroom with him.... especially with the extremely unpredictable mood he's been in lately. Plus when I add all of the " supposed " jokes he says to me that he swears is just him " goofing around " - when in reality it sounds to me like very clear insults, and criticisms; how could I have ever stopped for a moment to think he would approach me like that today ???? .... not when he's showed me so little respect, consideration, compassion, and kindness lately. 

But anyway... despite all of that... it happened. 

The " million dollar question / or issue " being.... Was it an act of " LOVE ", or an act of " Control - and / or Disguised Violence " ??!?!?!

That last part of my question I had to write because of how aggressive he was, instead of tender and passionate. 

How could he truly think that I would enjoy him being so aggressive, and forceful with me like that ?..... and then during the " ACT " he continually ignored my PLEAS for him to " take it easy ", or " STOP " ! ..... until finally when I found a slight moment that I saw as a chance to start edging away.... I took the opportunity, and started to move away from him ! As soon as I did that FINALLY he took the hint, and stopped what he was doing ! ... BUT not after bitting me several times ... so HARD that I could almost swear that he came very close to drawing blood ! 

After he left the bedroom to go " clean up "... I stayed there... laying in bed... for a little while, sobbing... tears rolling down my cheeks... sobbing quietly so he wouldn't hear, and get angry at me for it ! 

How can any of that be called " Love - Making " ?!?!?