feelings up in the air

I sit here at time and i just start to cry no i am not depressed im just feeling so very unsure all over this dang illness it can take you happyness and your lov for life and it puts a huge tink in it
i have allready stopped eatting some food and now at times im barley eatting at times im just not always hungery ..... I need more advice  i would really like to talk to others that have gone thru this pure hell i am sorry that i am swearing... my lov is really worried and he says i need to go see a dr i have my own dr i guess i need to find a dr that deals with just this .... And surgery scares the hell out of me everytime i have said surgery i have always had the side affects that you usally dont get well thats what i have been told by my other drs......... i also have Cronic anemia -and i have a para tyroid and Cronic ankle leg pain.....
could this be changed all around with what your eatting and such so no more pain?