Feeling my age etc. Its a downer day today.

I am feeling my age, weight etc.  Its a downer day today.  Who wants to be with a 55 years old woman anyways?  All the guys my age or older all want young hot women. Its so hard to meet someone.  I tried the online free dating service and it seems like such a meat market.  It is hard to go through all the profiles.  My friend Carol loves it and it suits her so much.  She is like a kid in the candy store.  I am different.  
Its a negative day like:
1.  Who wants to be with a 55 year old unemployed single woman?
2.  Who wants to hire a 55 year old unemployed woman?
3.  Who wants me?
Its okay.  I will get over it.  I will be like my old self again.  There are some days where it all sits on your shoulders and the next day you blow it off with a puff of air. 
I was having a lot of hot flashes since the beginning of the year.  Now the hot flashes are gone.  I am experiencing a lot of emotions.  I can cry at a drop of the hat on some days.  Today I just stayed home.  I did not feel like going out but it probably would have been the best for me if I went for a walk or something.
I am dating Dave but don't think it is a long term relationship.  I am registered on two free online dating services.  I always keep my eyes open to the possibilities. One never knows that is for sure.  I am tired of Dave's routine along with his room mate Rob and his female friend Alla.  I am just becoming tired of it all.
On the bright side, I get to babysit my grandson Tyson tomorrow.  I look forward to it greatly.  Next week Lisa and Grant are going to Las Vegas to help celebrate Grant's friend's wedding.  I will be staying at their place Wed-Friday.  Yahoo!
My brother Don has started a paper route.  If he does good, they might give him another route.  If this is the case, I can help him with both of us making some money.  Its an honest job that is for sure.  My  backup is if Lisa gets a 2nd job, they will hire me full-time to look after Tyson.  I can sure use the money.  Its an honest job as well.  I keep getting my resumes out on a regular basis so it is not me trying that is for sure.  
Yesterday I took my digital camera into Black's and got some pictures printed out. It did not cost that much and I love having the hard copy of pictures that I treasure.  I had five of Tyson, two of Dave, one of me, and two of my long time friend Wendy.  I already put them in my photo album and printed out labels for them.  I treasure my photo albums.  I look through them every so often.  For my mom, dad and Smokey, I created albums that are labelled "Tribute to my mom", "Tribute to my dad" and "Tribute to Smokey."  
I am wishing you all the best.  Let me know if you go through these horrible thoughts as well and how do you cope with them?  from Diane B.

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Diane...I can certainly relate when it comes to the dating sites. I have given up..you are only 55, I am 60 and you are right the men tend to want younger women....I look at it as their lose! I am lucky I have a job, I hope I have it until I retire. It keeps me busy and keeping in contact with people on a daily basis. I wish you luck with you job search...and tomorrow is always another day...Hugs, Ellen