Fantastical monastical
I’m realizing in a big way, we each need to toot our own horn. We may want to be admired and supported for who we are and what we do, but we also have to be prepared to and be strong enough to stand independently. I’m finding that truth here among the monastics so definitely. They are very tough and there’s a lot of road hazards when it comes to connecting but it’s taught me to listen more in depth about what I’m being asked to hear and what job I’m needing to get done. Coincidentally I just came from the gym and stepping into that world of beauty and young bodies made me realize in a greater way that I need to do the same there, create my own system to work out and keep my head focused and get the job done.
Now if I could just put all this wisdom into works. :).
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It's truly a balancing act on a trampoline see-saw.
Here's to you finding peace in the path and the connections and keeping to you first.
Thanks Mid! It all makes me ask myself what I am asking of people and make room for what they might want. I’ll try not to be so monolithic
Individuals who appear tough have often assembled a hard outer shell because of difficult circumstances in their lives. Monastics, like all of us, face their own internal struggles. Inner battles are often magnified in a close community. They aren't as easy to hide.
People sometimes reveal themselves through their work, the way that they serve, and how they endure. I'd imagine this is especially true in a monastery. Perhaps consider the subtleties - how they light the candles and how they bow, for example. Do they seem weary or energized? Do their eyes sparkle or look tired? Over time, you may begin to "hear" what isn't spoken - the weight someone carries, and the softness beneath the rigidity.
As you've said, the truth of who we are and what we carry will not always be affirmed by our surroundings. We have to affirm it ourselves, from within, and move forward. That means building an inner strength that doesn't rely on the approval or applause of others - in your words, becoming "strong enough to stand independently." You may not get many (if any) verbal "attaboys" there, but I believe you may see gratitude and respect if you look hard enough. Hugs.
One day, one hour. one moment at a time...xo
thanks Judy!! Really beautifully said again! and Thanks Janet xx!
in my own case, "tooting my own horn" was equivalent to not expecting other people to read my mind. i'm fully capable of speaking my mind, but i had it in my broken brain that i had to make due with whatever turds floated down the cesspool of my life. the best i could hope for is whatever scraps i could manipulate or cajole out of the world around me. it never occurred to me that i could have what i wanted if i just asked. sometimes the answer is, "no." but it's a whole heap more efficient to deal with a straight up no than to manipulate my way into a, "fuck, no."
thanks arfie!