Energy Level Going up
My energy level is going up these past couple days. Yesterday I woke up borderline hypomanic, and today while I woke up tired, the energy is hitting me now. I don't want to be up all night again. Last night it took all 3mg of Klonopin I'm prescribed to get me to go to sleep. I woke up a bit tired and not wanting to get out of bed, but once I was awake, I was awake. I did have some coffee in the morning, as is my routine on therapy mornings, but it wasn't a lot. Not even really a full cup.
Oh, and as for Subway being healthy? Not if you eat the footlong, I found out. It has as many calories as a Taco Bell Taco salad (and those things have 700 calories!). I had about 740 calories today from Subway. I was astonished! I didn't think it was that bad... I have to figure out what they count in their calorie counts, because it just seems horrible! I saw their bread can have 500 calories alone. I think next time I'm just going to go eat what I want instead of trying to go out of my way to go to Subway since it's such a calorie hole. Sorry about *another* food rant, it's just been on my mind a lot lately.
Therapy went okay today. We didn't talk about much, and she said I'm doing better on the things I need to work on. Next week we have a scheduling conflict, so I'm going to see her in 2 weeks. I hope to see her every week after that, but I'm not sure. I don't seem to have a lot to talk about. I think I need to be blunt with her and send her an email or something and take control of my therapy sessions. We talk about other stuff a lot, and I can't seem to lead the conversation to what I want to talk about. It's hard, because she is like a friend to me and I just want to have time with my friend, but at the same time I'm seeing her to get better and if I'm not getting better what is the point? Well, she says I'm getting better. I'm still spending a lot of time in bed and not getting out of the house as much as I should, not doing other things I should be doing... but I am doing good in other areas, like diet and exercise.
I think I should concentrate on how I'm doing in the bad areas and continue to do what I need to do in the good areas. Tomorrow I'm going to go for my 2.25 mile walk, and I have a bunch of walking I need to do for getting my pills and volunteer stuff done. I'm going to try and wake up at a reasonable time (read: before 11am) and go over to the clinic. I've been calling the guy for the volunteering, but he hasn't returned my calls. Then I got sick and didn't want to be around more sick people and pick up who knows what. Once I get out there and start volunteering, things are going to get better. Maybe I can even get a part-time job eventually. I'm thinking about it... I know I want to get out of the house and I could always use the extra money. I just don't know what I would be able to do. I'm pretty limited on what I can do. I've had problems holding down jobs before, especially come winter. I don't want another black mark on my record. At least with volunteering I can just resign and it's not a big deal. I think the whole "should I get a part time job" thing should be it's own entry.
Mood today was good, I had decent energy and feel pretty good. I don't know how high I'm going to go, if I'm going to go hypomanic or not, but we will see. Food: Went over my calories with that 740 calorie sub from Subway. Had I known... Stress- today I was stressed a couple times (at the foot doctor when she was working on my callouses with a scalpel) but just tried to breathe deep and relax. Sleep- I got about 9 hours last night... not quite enough, but not quite hypomanic levels yet.
Oh, and as for Subway being healthy? Not if you eat the footlong, I found out. It has as many calories as a Taco Bell Taco salad (and those things have 700 calories!). I had about 740 calories today from Subway. I was astonished! I didn't think it was that bad... I have to figure out what they count in their calorie counts, because it just seems horrible! I saw their bread can have 500 calories alone. I think next time I'm just going to go eat what I want instead of trying to go out of my way to go to Subway since it's such a calorie hole. Sorry about *another* food rant, it's just been on my mind a lot lately.
Therapy went okay today. We didn't talk about much, and she said I'm doing better on the things I need to work on. Next week we have a scheduling conflict, so I'm going to see her in 2 weeks. I hope to see her every week after that, but I'm not sure. I don't seem to have a lot to talk about. I think I need to be blunt with her and send her an email or something and take control of my therapy sessions. We talk about other stuff a lot, and I can't seem to lead the conversation to what I want to talk about. It's hard, because she is like a friend to me and I just want to have time with my friend, but at the same time I'm seeing her to get better and if I'm not getting better what is the point? Well, she says I'm getting better. I'm still spending a lot of time in bed and not getting out of the house as much as I should, not doing other things I should be doing... but I am doing good in other areas, like diet and exercise.
I think I should concentrate on how I'm doing in the bad areas and continue to do what I need to do in the good areas. Tomorrow I'm going to go for my 2.25 mile walk, and I have a bunch of walking I need to do for getting my pills and volunteer stuff done. I'm going to try and wake up at a reasonable time (read: before 11am) and go over to the clinic. I've been calling the guy for the volunteering, but he hasn't returned my calls. Then I got sick and didn't want to be around more sick people and pick up who knows what. Once I get out there and start volunteering, things are going to get better. Maybe I can even get a part-time job eventually. I'm thinking about it... I know I want to get out of the house and I could always use the extra money. I just don't know what I would be able to do. I'm pretty limited on what I can do. I've had problems holding down jobs before, especially come winter. I don't want another black mark on my record. At least with volunteering I can just resign and it's not a big deal. I think the whole "should I get a part time job" thing should be it's own entry.
Mood today was good, I had decent energy and feel pretty good. I don't know how high I'm going to go, if I'm going to go hypomanic or not, but we will see. Food: Went over my calories with that 740 calorie sub from Subway. Had I known... Stress- today I was stressed a couple times (at the foot doctor when she was working on my callouses with a scalpel) but just tried to breathe deep and relax. Sleep- I got about 9 hours last night... not quite enough, but not quite hypomanic levels yet.
Replies
I\'m glad your getting your energy back. I had a therapist that I saw each week, we talked like friends and never seemed to talk about anything, she said we were making progress, but I didn\'t see it. I stoped going because I didn\'t want a friend, I wanted a therapist, you really can\'t have both I found out and she agreed with me that we had become friends and and our sessions had suffered because of it. You need to decide if you want a therapist or a friend, you can\'t have both and make your therapy sessions work properly. Good luck.
funny, had the same situation with my ED therapist. we became more like friends and talked about all sorts of other stuff that was going on, i have my pshy/therapist i talk to about this, she said how i have improved. i asked her a couple of times if we could focus more on ed but it didnt happen. i had to stop seeing her, for my sake and for the money i was paying. glad your energy is good and great job on the exercise. the \"subway diet\" is for the 1/2 foot subs and on only certain ones, not a lot of meat, cheese etc.. hgss