end to another day.

Still not feeling any better. Have hit my wrist over and over again and it is sore, swollen and bruised...but i dont care, can take a lot more yet.when will this end...have appointment with pdoc next thursday, dont know if i can tell him, was doing so good when i saw him last month..i have the option of emailing him but dont even know if i can make myself do that.thing is i can hide how io feel so well..can walk in his room and convince him i am fine ,i can go off the Zoloft,,,when really the truth is i need more meds..i need seroquel.....how did it get to this...i was doing so well for so long...for what????????????i just dont belong here or anywhere...... just dont know what to do next.