End of the road

so my wife decided that she’s justified in taking off with our children to Alaska. She did this on Sunday. She exploded at me when I confronted her on her boyfriend who lives there. Then yesterday I had a order of protection served against me.  The things she said on that report shredded what was left of my heart. Everything she listed is what she had done to me. I’m so lost with it now. I haven’t seen or spoken to my kids in a week now. I wish I had forced her to go back on her meds now. I just didn’t want to make her feel worse for needing them. Now I’m paying for that mistake dearly. At least our common friends know the whole truth. Not that it helps my pain any.  My wife is my queen, my whole universe and she’s now betrayed me in every conceivable way. So why do I still love her unconditionally????

im so very stupid.