Eeep...
...and again I say, eep. Today was rocky to say the least. This entry also doubles as a goal update (see the very bottom), but most of the news isn't good. Just thought I'd warn everyone.
I had been concerned that my class in Legal Ethics wouldn't come off because only 10 people signed up. But if it had been that way, I would have gotten notice of it. There wasn't, so it's off and running. To that end: It's a lot to go through in seven weeks, so if there are a few stints when I'm not updating my status here for a couple of nights, don't panic. I'm not ignoring anyone intentionally. Most likely it will just mean I do not have time to stop by on that (those) day(s).
So the class is on its way, but I...seemed stuck in neutral. Not much happened...just a course intro and a discussion over what ethics means to paralegals. I have two chapters to read (about 30 or so pages) and some review questions off of that to answer.
The problem was that the other night, I had one of my famous panic attacks...the kind that keeps me from sleeping when I should and leaves me mentally numb. I got through the class okay, but when I went to my part-time job afterwards, I felt like I was on autopilot. Not good. A nap when I finally came home didn't help matters, and there's no point in trying to study if I can't think straight. So I had to throw it in for the day.
There shouldn't be many consequences from this -- especially because half of my class didn't have the course textbook with them -- but I know with the way that I study that I'm going to have to shortcut and skim some of the material tomorrow as opposed to really reading it. I had to do this over the spring too when I was stressing out horribly, and while I am far, far too honest to even consider cheating, having to settle for skimming does not sit well with me. Someday the "flash memory" that got me through the spring is going to fail, and then what am I going to do?
On a happier note, a friend outside of here taught me how to trick my brain into thinking I was working with associates constantly. "Take them for the role that they're playing," she told me. "You may not know it but you've had to 'half-trust' already to get this far."
Me half-trusting people and taking themfor whatever role they have is hard to accept...but it's doable, and would make some of the scary stuff in the fall a little less scary if I can hold on to that thought.
I had been concerned that my class in Legal Ethics wouldn't come off because only 10 people signed up. But if it had been that way, I would have gotten notice of it. There wasn't, so it's off and running. To that end: It's a lot to go through in seven weeks, so if there are a few stints when I'm not updating my status here for a couple of nights, don't panic. I'm not ignoring anyone intentionally. Most likely it will just mean I do not have time to stop by on that (those) day(s).
So the class is on its way, but I...seemed stuck in neutral. Not much happened...just a course intro and a discussion over what ethics means to paralegals. I have two chapters to read (about 30 or so pages) and some review questions off of that to answer.
The problem was that the other night, I had one of my famous panic attacks...the kind that keeps me from sleeping when I should and leaves me mentally numb. I got through the class okay, but when I went to my part-time job afterwards, I felt like I was on autopilot. Not good. A nap when I finally came home didn't help matters, and there's no point in trying to study if I can't think straight. So I had to throw it in for the day.
There shouldn't be many consequences from this -- especially because half of my class didn't have the course textbook with them -- but I know with the way that I study that I'm going to have to shortcut and skim some of the material tomorrow as opposed to really reading it. I had to do this over the spring too when I was stressing out horribly, and while I am far, far too honest to even consider cheating, having to settle for skimming does not sit well with me. Someday the "flash memory" that got me through the spring is going to fail, and then what am I going to do?
On a happier note, a friend outside of here taught me how to trick my brain into thinking I was working with associates constantly. "Take them for the role that they're playing," she told me. "You may not know it but you've had to 'half-trust' already to get this far."
Me half-trusting people and taking themfor whatever role they have is hard to accept...but it's doable, and would make some of the scary stuff in the fall a little less scary if I can hold on to that thought.
Replies
Panic attacks aren\'t fun, and they do leave you in a funky mood. I have them a lot in my one class, it\'s not fun having them in class. Dunno if it\'s an option for you, but what I do is fine an empty hall and have a nap sitting up against the wall/chair. That\'s just me though, I can sleep in the weirdest places. Sometimes a power nap is just what is needed.
The first day of class is usually always administration stuff. I think I\'ve had maybe one or two classes where they went into it right off the bat. Come to think of it those were my summer classes.
I think probably because I\'m in computers I don\'t read so much as \"skim\" the material. Unless it\'s a topic I really am interested in I will only take the important parts from reading material, I find anything else is just filler, there usually isn\'t anything important, though I may be wrong. Side notes are the best for test questions. As long as you know what your looking for to get out of it, skimming isn\'t always the bad way to go.
I admire your not wanting to cheat, it\'s not a very good thing to get into. I must admit I have done it once or twice. Well the prof gave us the questions to the exam, so it wasn\'t really cheating...
Hope tomorrows class goes good for you.