Doomed to Life

How can one choose sides in a fight that he has created? Such a simple debate, yet it causes so many issues and so much fear. Curse this duality of my very nature, in my very soul. Damned be this indecisive behaviour that grips me with such terror and ferocity. The struggles of my mind is what plagues my soul. To choose one, is to choose bliss and happiness with the nagging thought of having made the wrong choice. The other, to be haunted by pain and hate till my very breathe leaves me. I pray to God to take away my pain, but alas it is Fated to me. What can a man do with such wretched fear? How can he live with the forces of nature warring over his soul. Neither Destiny with her power nor Fate with his, nor the trees with their eternal wisdom calm this tempestuous and writhing heart. Such an unspeakable fright has chained my Life to a vessel doomed for the abyss of Neptune's realm where even the great Syrens fear to venture. Oh the power of Mercury to be mine, to fly away from this world and its troubles. Alas, only Death's cold hands can free me from this prison these cages of my soul. But how can one seek Death when he is already dead?