done with errands
after the car service (only $85!! whew!!)
I got my hair cut - then bought Blue food - and then
got a starbucks. :)
It's really good to have a day where I can pretty much do what I want
and not have too much to do for the monastery.
I have a therapy session at 3pm and then food prep
at 345 - and then set up for chapel and so on.
Things are really good. I don't feel super strong - but
I do feel like I am starting to see life in terms of the different
systems we walk through - socially and professionally and societally.
I'm trying to not to give it too much focus but I am seeing that there's
kinds of orders whereever you go that you kind of need to respect.
Though I wish I could purely love god and love the god in others - I am also seeing politics in life.
And also seeing the 'not so needed' aspect to take, when a place you walk
into doesn't seem 'your kind of place' (my barber shop today was full biker type place
and I am definitely not that lol - but it all went well - just happy in my skin - no dire projections of nerves).
Replies
In all honesty , I just spent about 15 minutes searching for the perfect YouTube video to reply to your journal. I was searching for the ending scenes of Mr Belvidere episodes when he recaps the episode of his living situation in his journal.
I decided not to spend more time watching Mr Belvidere and getting on with more important things like making dinner and folding laundry.
But the sentiment was there.
Socially, professionally, societally covers a lot of ground. Reminds you how much of a speck each of us are in the five layer lasagna that is life (can you tell I'm hungry?)
Layer one represents the base and foundations where everyone rolls up their sleeves and pitches in to support the other four layers.
Layer two is the slippery noodles that slither in olive oil on the pan before they get smushed and smother the hardworking base at the bottom of the pan.
Omg markus, I can’t finish writing anymore, i am too hungry for lasagna.
Haha
Sorry. It was a long stressful messy day. Lasagna is now in the oven.
In all seriousness,
You covered a lot of thoughts here. Walking into a place where you felt out of place like the barber….. the ongoing awakenings in your current community and seeking things in the next avenue that feels like home.
Those are all tremendous heartfelt sort of realities that we face each day - and it can be sort of overwhelming to pull them all together.
I am in the same boat as you. Trying to figure things out. Trying to figure out what is best for me. Doing all the therapy and the shuffling and trying and not giving up.. If this doesn’t work, try that. If that doesn’t work, try this. Turn left. Turn right. Do the hokey pokey and turn yourself around.
Im glad you have Blue. I have Bella to keep me going as I keep trying. One day, all this hard work and strategy will pay off. Eventually. In the meantime, its good to have friends. To have places to express. To connect.
But carefully connect. Filters. But still take risks.
Bella says hey Blue!
thanks Nikki! Have a good day!